Fate and Destiny
by Lovepeaceandwar
Summary: Sam and Freddie are a dynamic duo that can either blossom into something more or crumble and fall apart. What happens when Carly takes a chance for romance with Freddie? Will fate bring two soul mates together or throw too many obstacles at them and ultimately tear them apart? Disclaimer: I don't own iCarly or any of the music or films referenced in this story.
1. First Encounter

You've got the music in you  
>Don't let go<br>You've got the music in you  
>One dance left<br>This world is gonna pull through  
>Don't give up<br>You've got a reason to live  
>Can't forget<br>We only get what we give  
>New Radicals -You Get What You Give<p>

Sam POV:

It was instant. I felt it upon first sight. No, not love. It was intense and strong. I stood upon the top of the slide to take in the view. My blood began to boil as I looked into his eyes. A small brunette boy dresses in a yellow and black striped polo with khaki shorts. He was looking at me. I recognized him as being in the same grade as myself. I knew of every student in the fifth grade. Then I remembered. The new boy spoke of by teachers only a few days before. I shook my wild curly blonde her and patted down my hideous pink dress. Such a monstrous outfit did not belong to me, but to my sister. I of course managed to dirty all my clothes leaving me to borrow clothes from her wardrobe.

We were two young kids having a stare down in the middle of a crowded playground. His eyes never left mine. My icy blue eyes glared into his deep chocolate-brown. He smiled at me. Never in all my life has this happened. He looked at me with a warm and inviting smile. I am not someone people chose to smile at. Having friends was not something I truly knew. Most kids stayed away from me. Not necessarily because I am mean. I'm not really nice either. They were afraid. Not of me, but my mother. She stumbled into the classroom drunk embarrassing myself and my twin sister, Melanie (the same I borrowed clothing from) on the first day of kindergarten.

Pam Puckett is a woman who is in no Moran respectful. She respects no one and nothing. She doesn't even respect herself. This was obvious from her inability to dress in proper attire. She much preferred to wear bikinis in public. Many of the children were scarred from the sight of her stomach fat and stretch marks as she barged in. Drinking at such an early hour became a norm for my mother. Our father left the family early in the year, before the summer. The caring and loving mother I once knew had vanished. She lost he job and turned to bar tending.

Mom starting singing Melanie's praises to the teacher. She told him of her brilliance. She was not being delusional for Mel was soon taken out of Ridgeway Elementary School to visit to private boarding school she would soon be attending. I was the problem child. I was too rambunctious and energetic for my own good. I sought danger in my life. If not climbing the tallest tree, I was chasing stray hounds in the neighborhood. Mom began to dance around the room while slurring her words. Later in the week, a parent had my mother investigated. Of course they discovered her criminal record. They told every parent in the school and each told they kids too stay away from me and my sister. It's been 5 years since. Melanie was all I had, but she, like Dad, abandoned me. Kids become more friendly over time. They learned they shouldn't have judged us based on our mother. It was too late. I gained a reputation as bully for defending myself against my critics using physical force. Girls like Wendy, Tasha, Lexi and Terrene were friendly with me and I in return was kinder to them.

I stood at the bottom of the slide that I just rode down. I felt him watching me while I tried to enjoy the wind on my face. The freedom of the outdoors could not stop the overwhelming feeling building in my chest. I quickly moved out-of-the-way to avoid being hit by the following child that was bound to ride down. All the other children began to leave due to their parents coming. My mother did not care. She left me to walk home alone. He began to approach me. I wanted to run, but not due to fear. He simply made me feel uncomfortable. Being away of the hassle running would be in such a frilly dress, I opted against doing so. I stood my ground and looked him in the eye. I began to wonder for what reason he would start school in May with only one month left.

"Hi. I'm Freddie Benson," said the peculiar new boy I did not know.  
>"Why are you here?" I asked him desiring an answer for his being at the school playground when everyone else has left.<br>"I'm waiting for my mother to arrive. She is quite odd. She told me she was going to be late. She is busy working at the hospital as a nurse. What's your name?" He responded as politely as possible. It was almost sickening. It certainly made my stomach turn.  
>"Nonya."<br>"Nonya? Well that's an unusual name. I can't judge much. My mother named me Fredward. Why are you here?"  
>"Well, you see. The answer to that question is the same as the one you asked about my name. Nonya business" I responded just as rudely as I had before. If I was mean, he would leave and I would be left alone. I've grown too used to that lonely feeling I get so often. Getting close to people only leaves room to be left behind, yet again. He initially looked confused and then he laughed.<br>"You're so funny. Are you sure you don't want to tell me your name?"  
>"If it speeds up this conversation, then I will till you. My name is Sam Puckett. You are one weird kid, Freddork" I replied hoping he would quickly leave. I could not bring myself to move my feet and make an exit.<br>"Is that short for Samantha? It's a pretty name for a pretty girl." That angered me. I am no daffodil. I won't be seen as a prissy girly girl by some random new kid. I punched him in the shoulder hard, but not anywhere near my full strength. He cried out in pain.  
>"Call me Samantha again and you will face even more pain. Now leave. You are such a nub."<br>"That really hurt Sam. You are way too strong for a girl."  
>"What do you mean 'for a girl'? You sexist pig. Girls can be just a strong, if not stronger, than boys. You need to toughen up."<br>"I didn't mean that. I was just surprised by your strength. Can you wait with me for my mom? I can give you a ride home." It was getting late and I didn't feel like walking all the way. I also didn't want to continue talking to this dork.  
>"Why are you scared?"<br>"I'm not afraid. I just don't want to be alone. We can just talk about anything, if you want. Do you have any siblings? What about your parents? I told you about my mom." I gave into my laziness and decided to stay and talk to him.  
>"My family is complicated. I rather not talk about them. What about your dad?" As soon as I asked the question I regretted it. The regret had something to do with the pain in his face he looked sad.<br>"My dad died a few weeks ago. That's why I moved here. My mom needed too be closer to family. I'm from Chicago." He lost his father. Like me, he didn't have a dad. Maybe he could understand the feeling of being alone. Sure my dad didn't die, but he still is gone.  
>"I don't have a dad either. He didn't die or something like that. He just left me and my family. Now that I think about it, he might be dead. I wouldn't know. Let's talk about something else." I felt the need to comfort him so I patted him on the back. I don't know why but I felt sympathetic towards him.<br>"What's your favorite movie? Galaxy Wars is mine. I watch all of them every other Saturday" he responded. I smiled at his nerdy hobby. He returned the smile.  
>"I don't think we have the same taste in films. I favor horror. What about music?"<br>"Well it's a bit embarrassing. Most kids don't listen to this stuff on fifth grade."  
>"Tell me. You can trust me."<br>"Well I listen to really old music. I like to music from the 70s and 80s." We had something in common. Never have I ever thought I would share a common interest with a nerd.  
>"Me too. I like Queen and Fleetwood Mac and Journey and Bon Jovi and Hall &amp; Oats."<br>"I love all of them. They are so awesome. I've never meant another ten-year old who like old music." I playfully shoved his shoulder and he winced in pain. I remembered that was where I had punched him earlier.  
>"I'd like to say I'm one of a kind. Dude, like I said before you need to toughen up."<br>"What do you suggest I do?"  
>"Well I can help make you stronger I guess. If you can take a lot of pain, you should eventually be able to dish it out. I think you might me too sensitive and fragile for that."<br>"No please help me. Make me tougher. I beg of you," he pleaded with me.  
>"Okay okay. I'm going to make your life a real struggle sometimes. I won't mean any of it, of course. I didn't think I like you at first."<br>"And now?" he asked waiting for my response.  
>"You're alright."<p>

His mother the arrived. I was shocked. I was utterly surprised how such a level-headed boy came from such a nutcase. She immediately began spraying him with what she called "cloud block." She asked if he was wearing his "anti bacterial underwear." She agreed to take me home and I knew it was going to be a long ride. She repeatedly asked questions about the school's sanitation. I knew from the start she was an overprotective mother. Freddie looked over at me embarrassed. I almost felt bad for him. At least his mother cared.

I followed up on my deal with Freddie and made his life more difficult. He knew I didn't mean it. For the rest of the school year and all summer Freddie and I spent time at the playground. We exchange CDs and spoke of music. We grew closer and I learned what it was like to have a friend. I wasn't afraid to make friends anymore. I hung out with girls like Wendy, Tasha, Lexi and Terrene more willingly. We all become friends of sorts. Freddie was still my best friend though. Despite having him, I wanted a girl as a best friend as well. Little did I know that my wish would soon be granted.

AN: First Fanfiction Story Ever! Review Please? Ideas? thoughts? I'm just a senior in high school. Don't judge me. Favorite quote or song 70s to 80s?


	2. New Girl

Say, Candy and Ronnie, have you seen them yet  
>But they're so spaced out, Bennie and the Jets<br>Oh but they're weird and they're wonderful  
>Oh Bennie she's really keen<br>She's got electric boots a mohair suit  
>You know I read it in a magazine<br>Bennie and the Jets  
>Elton John -Bennie and the Jets<p>

Freddie POV:

It's been 4 months since I met her and I can truly say I am a changed man (boy) because of her. I laid in bed listening to the new music Sam had given me a few days before. I thought of my friend's golden locks of heaven cascading down her back. Her chilling blue ice always pierce in to mine. I don't know why I had done it. I have know idea why I talked to her the first time. I was new and lonely. I have always struggled talking to pretty girls. This was different. She was different. Sam is like no girl I have ever met before. No girl is as funny and mischievous. Since we have first met she has grown in her total number of friends. I have too. I befriended Gibby, Jonah, Shane, Wesley and Rodney. Sam was still my best friend. No girl had her appetite for ham and bacon and fried chicken and fat cakes. She is the only one who makes my heart beat faster. I don't know much about her home life, but I know all about her. Seeing her in a dress like the first day never happens. She always wears layered shirts or hoodies and cargo pants. She dresses like a boy but is more beautiful than any other girl. My mother wouldn't approve of my crush on her. She would say a relationship with Sam would threaten my masculinity. To make my mother happy I decided to get over Sam. I'm going to find myself a girly girl to crush on. I don't want to risk my friendship with Sam if she doesn't feel the same way anyway.

Sam and I don't have a normal relationship. Many think that she abuses me. Everyone knows that we're friends. Many don't understand why I am friends with her. She makes me laugh like no other. She doesn't bully me. She makes me stronger. I stand up to her now. I'm not nearly as sensitive as I once was. No one else that's our music. Music is our thing. Everyone else listens to the stuff on the radio. Michael Jackson's Thriller album has done more for me than anything on the radio. It's kept me entertained in the car with my overbearing mother on trips back to Chicago. It's kept me company while I sit on my fire scape taking in the view. I fall asleep listening to the rumors album by Fleetwood Mac. Don't stop believing by Journey plays in my head while I take a test and need confidence to finish. Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen is my all-time favorite song to sing in the shower. That is the music of my life and I share it with Sam.

My mother enters my room. She was wearing a gray cardigan. She had on a purple blouse underneath. She matched this with a pair of brown trousers. From my fashion sense, I spend too much time with my mom. Being the over protective mother she is, she chooses not to knock. She says it would give me an opportunity to hide something from her. God forbid I keep secrets from my mother. "Freddiebear the new neighbors are moving across the hall."  
>"Mom please stop calling me that."<br>"Get out of bed. Did you take you tick bath this morning?" Of course not. It has no purpose. I don't care of it is precautionary. Everyone who doesn't take them certainly don't have ticks. Just a select few.  
>"Yes Mom. I know to follow the rules to be your perfect baby boy," I respond. I can practically hear Sam's laughter in regards to my response.<br>"Hurry up, Freddie. We are going to bring over some cucumber cups for them to eat. It's the neighborly thing to do." If they had any common sense, the won't eat them. The bet thing to do is say thank you. The second she leaves they better throw it out. Mom makes sure to add organic seasoning and other junk to make it taste nasty. She says it's for nutrition. I don't think so.  
>"I'm coming Mom."<p>

Wearing my green polo, I follow her out of the apartment and into the hall. Mom politely knocks on the door. An odd man opens the door. He initially appears normal until he starts screaming. We look behind him and see the reason for such behavior. The kitchen sink was on fire. How is that possible? Mon runs and grabs the fire extinguisher, after giving me the box of cucumber cups. Luckily she is able to put the fire out. The man looks between the two of us and asks "Who are you?"  
>My mother responds "We live across the hall and wanted to welcome the new neighbors. I'm Marissa Benson and this is my son Fredward."<br>"Call me Freddie, please" I plead with him. I get Fredward enough from Mom and Sam. Sam never calls me Freddie unless it's serious. I'm just Freddork or Fredweird or Frednub to her.  
>"I'm Spencer Shay. Are you in the sixth grade?"<br>"Yes I am going to be. I attend Ridgeway Elementary School. Why do you ask?"  
>"My younger sister is going there and is in the same grade as you. Maybe she can make a new friend. CARLY!" Spencer ran and screamed up the stairs. Soon a reply is yelled down stairs.<br>"WHAT?!"  
>"COME MEET THE NEIGHBORS!"<br>"OKAY!"

A cute brown haired brown eyes girl comes down stairs. She is easily the perfect image of a girly girl. Her t-shirt was red and her skirt was a light pink. She seemed sweet and kind. The perfect girl to help me get over Sam.  
>"Hi I'm Carly Shay."<br>Spencer introduced us, "this is Ms. Benson and her son Freddie."  
>My mother spoke "nice to meet you, Carly. Freddie giver her the box of treats."<br>"Treats?" Spencer asked eager to find out what is in the bag.  
>"Yes. I made nutritious cucumber cups just for you, our new neighbors."<br>"Here Carly," I said as attempted to give her the bag. The transaction was intercepted by Spencer who grabbed the box and took out a cucumber cup. He sniffed it and then suddenly the box caught fire.  
>"Ahhhh!" Spencer screamed out in fear. Mom ran to get the fire extinguisher and she once more put out the fire.<br>"Does this happen a lot?" I ask Carly.  
>She responds "Way more than the usual person. Do you go to Ridgeway Elementary?"<br>"Yeah. Your brother told me you are going into the sixth grade as well. Where are you from?"  
>"I lived in Texas for a while and it was awful. I hope I never go back. No offense to all Texans. Some Texans are just cruel," Carly replies.<br>"How do you feel about starting a new school?" I ask her.  
>"I'm so excited. School starts tomorrow. My first day here an I already made a new friend. We are friends right?"<br>"We can be friends if you want. I can introduce you to some people."  
>"Like who?"<br>"Well there is this girl named Sam who is very different from the others. She's a little rough around the edges, but she's cool and super funny."

My mother who was previously in a discussion with Spencer about proper fire safety decides to interject her opinion. Not that it was wanted. "Stay away from that girl. She's nothing but trouble. All she does is cause you pain. I don't know what you hang out with her, Fredward."

"Fredward?" Carly asks with an amused look on her face.  
>"Please don't call me that. Sam is a lot of fun you'll love her."<br>"Is she like your girlfriend?"  
>"I hope not. I would never allow it," Mom says. I didn't ask for her opinion and neither did anyone else.<br>"No we are just friends. But we can be more than friends if you want?" I reply. I desperately need to get over Sam. We never even dated. I can move on to Carly.  
>"Oh Freddie. I'm not looking for a relationship. Aren't we too young for that? We're only eleven. We can still be friends."<br>"That's alright. Being friends is just fine. I have to get home and call a friend. Bye Carly. Mom, let's go."

I went back to room and called Sam's home. I knew her mother wouldn't answer the phone she is never awake in the middle of the day.  
>"Hello?"<br>"Hey Sam."  
>"'Sup Frednub."<br>"Just met my new neighbor. She's going to Ridgeway"  
>"Really?"<br>"Yeah. Her name is Carly. She's pretty and girly and sweet."  
>"Can't wait to meet her."<br>"I told her about you."  
>"What did you say?"<br>"Just that you are a lot of fun."  
>"Well it's true. Even you and your dorky self know how awesome I am."<br>"I am pretty awesome too."  
>"Your awesome in a different way."<br>"What type of way?"  
>"A nubby way."<br>"What exactly is a nub?" I smirked as I pondered the question I asked her.  
>"You should know what you are, sir. Anyway, guess what I'm listening to."<br>"You Make My Dreams Come True by Hall & Oates."  
>"Wrong answer, nub. Try again." I could hear the grin on her face. She must really like the music.<br>"Sam, just tell me."  
>"Alright alright. Total Eclipse of the Heart by Bonnie Tyler."<br>"Really? You usually hate power ballads."  
>"I know, but it shockingly has grown on me."<br>"I'll see you at school tomorrow right?"  
>"Yes, Fredloser. You will see me. I'll try not to prank you on the first day. I gotta go brush my cat's teeth. Bye."<br>"See ya."  
>I hung up and confined to listen to music before I decided to play video games until bed time. It really calmed my nerves. I won't tell Sam I asked out Carly though. Carly and this big brown eyes. I think I can fall for her. She seems kind and upbeat. We probably don't have much in common. I can tell from her girly nature she is more into fashion then technology. We should be able to get along well though. We both are down to earth. We can be perfect for each other. It wouldn't be as difficult as it would be if it were someone else. Sam. We bicker and fight, but she makes me smile and laugh. It was only a small crush on Sam. Carly could probably do that two but not the same way. We could have a nice calm relationship. I've decided to love Carly. I fell asleep thinking of Carly but found myself dreaming of Sam. I'm too young for this. What happened to girls are icky?<p>

AN: Reviews= more chapters. 4 more chapters have already been written. They'll be posted when I feel Chapter 1 and 2 get enough reviews. Favorite quote or moment? Criticism or praise? REVIEW! Next chapter will be last childhood focused. After that is all teenagers and their drama.


	3. A Trio is Formed

The way you make me feel  
>(The way you make me feel)<br>You really turn me on  
>(You really turn me on)<br>You knock me off of my feet  
>(You knock me off of my feet)<br>My lonely days are gone  
>(My lonely days are gone)<br>Michael Jackson -The Way You Make Me Feel

Sam POV:

I walk through the halls of Ridgeway Elementary looking for the classroom. I flatten out the wrinkles in my jean skirt as I walk. I'm wearing purple leggings underneath. My top is black with a design that resembles purple paint splatter. I wanted to dress up for the first day, but I will never be a daffodil. Of course, I see my favorite nerd waiting for me at the door. He's dresses in his blue and gray button up shirt.

"Hey Dork."  
>"Hi Sammy," he replied.<br>"How much do you like pain?"  
>"Not enough to call you that again."<br>"Good answer, Fredlumps. Were you waiting for me?"  
>"You know it. Have you seen the new girl?"<br>"Nope. What's her name again?"  
>"Carly."<br>"I used to know a Carly. Her brother burned down the old school 3 years ago and they had it build a new one. She had to move because her dad was in the Air Force or marines or something. We used to be close. She was new that year too."

Carly was just another person who left me. Sure it wasn't her choice. Her unexpected departure still hurt. Carly wanted to stay. It was a rarity to make friends for me. Being friends with Freddie is a risk. I just wonder when he will leave me too. Freddie turned his head and calls out to a girl."Hey Carly!"

"Carly?" I look behind me and see my old friend Carly Shay.  
>"Sam?" She replies. "I haven't seen you in forever."<br>"I know right. We haven't emailed the past few months."  
>"I know. I missed you so much."<br>"Missed you too. You were the closest thing I ever had to a girl best friend ever."  
>"Me too. I don't really bond well with other girls."<br>"I know what you mean. We used to be inseparable when you live here the first time for those 6 months. What are you doing here? I thought you moved to Texas."  
>"I did. Trust me, I am no cowgirl. I didn't fit in their at all. They made fun of me because I didn't have an accent. They said I talk funny. They are the ones talking funny. People can be so frustrating." She looks to my right and notices the boy beside me. "Oh hey Freddie."<br>I turn to Freddie. "Yo Fredwierd, why didn't you tell me Carly Shay moved back here?"  
>"How was I supposed to know you knew her?"<br>"Well maybe if you gave me a last name you would find out."  
>"Well she was new to Seattle, I figured she's never been before."<br>"You figured wrong."  
>"You could have told me that you knew a Carl)."<br>"I did two minutes ago, Nub!"  
>"Demon!"<br>"Geek!"  
>"Bully!"<br>"Mama's boy!"  
>"HEY!" Carly screamed to stop the argument from continuing. "Do you always fight like this?"<br>"We call this bickering," I say to my old friend.  
>"Yeah it definitely not fighting. It's way more like bickering."<br>"What's the difference?!" Carly asks.  
>"Fighting involves actual conflict this is just useless banter for our entertainment," I answer.<br>"Oh," Carly responds. "How do you two know each other?"  
>"Freddie moved here 3 months and it's been this way ever since."<br>"You've been fighting from the start?"  
>Freddie answers her "bickering is not fighting."<br>"Why do you fight- I mean 'bicker' in this first place?" asks Carly using air quotes around the word 'bicker.'  
>"We are complete opposites. I like to bend rules till they break. He likes to follow them. He likes Sci-Fi. I like Horror. There's bound to be disagreements and bickering."<br>"Then why do you hang out together if all you do is bicker?"  
>"Why not?"<br>"Why don't you just answer the question?"  
>"We get each other" Freddie and I answer simultaneously. We glare at each other. I slap him lightly and he returns the slap gently. I chose not to hit him again.<br>"You two are so weird," Carly comments.  
>"We know," once again we reply in unison.<br>"You guys should be luck that I like it."

Hours later, I sat with Carly and Freddie at lunch. When Freddie went to get his wallet, Carly and I decided to catch up on everything we've missed in each other's lives. I ask her, "What's been going on in your life out of Seattle?"  
>"I haven't really had a life out of Seattle. All I did was homework."<br>"You almost sound like as much of a nerd as Fredgeek."  
>"What is with that by the way?"<br>"What do you mean?"I asked her sincerely confuse by her question.  
>"Why are you two so close, when you guys just bicker and have so little in common?"<br>"Well honestly. It's interesting to get his opinion sometimes, no matter how nubby it is."  
>"I think he has a crush on you." My heart started to beat faster. Why would she think that? Is it that unusual for a boy and girl to be best friends without having an undying love for each other.<br>"Carly we are just friends. Why would you think that?"  
>"Boys and girls can't just be friends."<br>"Says who?"  
>"Everyone! But if you say your just friends, I believe you."<br>"Thank you."  
>"You were all he talked about, when we first met."<br>"Here you go again. Can't you just drop it?" I just wanted this conversation to end. Who knew Carly was so persistent?  
>"I'm just stating facts. All he did was talk about how awesome you were and defend you to his mother."<br>"His mom is crazy. Everyone knows I'm awesome all because the dweeb talks about it doesn't he likes me. It probably wasn't all you talked about."  
>"I guess your right. It wasn't."<br>"See?"  
>"He asked me on a date," Carly responded.<br>"Really? Aren't we young for that? I can guess you totally rejected him."  
>"You guessed correctly. He's not really my type. We don't have anything in common, kinda like you two."<br>"Why did you think he likes me, if he asked you out?"  
>"Well it sounded kinda forced you know. It was like he didn't want to ask me, but he had to."<br>"Why would he have to?"  
>"I don't know. Maybe it was to forget about his feelings for someone else."<br>"Carly! Let it go."  
>"Fine. Where's Melanie?"<br>"Boarding school in England. Freddie doesn't know she exist."  
>"Why not?"<br>"I just don't want him too."  
>"But why?"<br>"I don't want him to like her more than me, the way everyone else does."  
>"That's not true."<br>"Yeah it is. And I don't want to lose Freddie to Melanie."  
>"Why do you care so much? Do you like him?"<br>"Carly I just want one friend who wouldn't pick her over me."  
>"Okay okay."<p>

After school, Carly was taken home by her brother, Spencer. He wasn't allowed in the school because of what happened the last time. He had to wait inside the car for her. Freddie and I were sitting on the swing. Sharing earbuds listening to Elton John's Tiny Dancer, we talked about our day and our teacher.

"Why did you ask Carly out?" I ask Freddie. I turn my head to the side to show my curiosity.  
>"I just wanted to get to know her better. She looks pretty," he responded to my question with a small smile. He rubbed his palms on his pants. They appear sweaty like he is nervous.<br>"Looks aren't everything. Ideas like that are exactly why I am not a girly girl."  
>"Why is that?"<br>"People judge others based on looks. Though I think this is idiotic, it is true. If I dress all girly, people will think I'm weak. Because I dress like this, kids know I'm not someone they can mess with. Maybe you can stop dressing like a nerd and stop those kids from teasing you. I can't keep shoving my fist down the throats of every kid that insults you. I don't want to get expelled." I shook my head at his mind set. Looks aren't everything. They shouldn't even be important, but sadly in society they are. I thought Freddie was above that.  
>"My mother would never allow me to wear anything else. Besides, I like my clothes. I shouldn't have to change for the approval of anyone else" Freddie closes his eyes to listen to the music playing.<br>"Okay. I'm not surprised that a dork like you would like that nubby shirt. Anyway, now that we are in sixth grade are you going to ask out every pretty girl you see?"  
>"Sam, are you jealous?" I saw the smirk on his face. I suddenly had the desire to smack him in the mouth. Being jealous would imply I had romantic feelings for him. Carly accused me of the same earlier. I just want to be his friends. Why does everyone want to claim it is something more.<p>

"Jealous? Jealous of what? You are my best friend. I'm just trying to protect you like I always do. I don't want some 'pretty girl' to go and break your heart. Maybe I should just leave you to the wolves," I tell him hoping he will drop the subject matter of my feelings towards him.  
>"So I guess you're not jealous. It's nice to know you care about me and my well being."<br>"Do you really like Carly? What else do you like besides her being pretty?"  
>"Yeah I like her. She's nice and sweet to everyone. She's caring and willing to share. She's not stubborn like you and I. She's a good person and a funny girl."<br>"So are you always going to chase after her? Carly will never love you, Fredward."  
>"You don't know that, Sam."<br>"Yes I do," I responded to him.

Ms. Benson came to pick us up sooner than usual. After school music jams, became a rarity of me and Freddie throughout the year. We spent more time bickering at Carly's apartment. Since the three of us have become a trio, we have less time to be a duo. I missed discussing music with him. Carly liked top 100 pop songs. To be honest, I missed talking to Freddie about everything. Now it's like we just bickered. We never had time to be ourselves alone. As time passes a greater distance between the two of us forms.

AN: This is the last of the childhood years. Next will take place after season 2 and the completion of grade 9. Review for more.


	4. Romance in the air?

I'll march my band out,  
>I will beat my drum,<br>And if I'm fanned out,  
>Your turn at bat, sir,<br>At least I didn't fake it.  
>Hat, sir, I guess I didn't make it.<br>Get ready for me, love,  
>'cause I'm a commer,<br>I simply gotta march,  
>My heart's a drummer.<br>Nobody, no, nobody  
>Is gonna rain on my parade!<br>Barbra Streisand -Don't Rain On My Parade

Freddie POV:

Today is the day. It's the very end of the last day of freshman year. Who cares? That's not why I'm excited. It's the day Carly finally agrees to go out with me. I just have to get her alone and charm her. That will be hard. I identify myself as a pretty smooth guy. I have to separate her from Sam. That is going to be difficult. Those two are almost always joined at the hip. You don't get one without the other, but they have very different personalities.

I know what you are thinking. Why is today any different from the others? Why do you think Carly won't reject like she has in the past again and again and again? Well two weeks ago Carly ended her relationship with Griffin. She was vulnerable and ready to give up on love. Sam best him with a butter sock to cheer her up. Carly is almost desperate to find a good guy and love. I'm a good guy and I am perfectly capable of giving her the love she deserves. At this very moment, I can see Carly and Sam talking near their lockers. All I have to do is wait for Sam to leave.

Sam POV:  
>"Hey Carls. Are you feeling better?"<br>"Yeah. I can finally look at boys without wanting to rip their heads off."  
>"No need to blame the whole male species for Griffin being a jerk."<br>"I know. I just want real love for once. You know what I mean right?"  
>"No. Do you know who your talking to? Mama doesn't need a man."<br>"Everyone needs someone to love Sam. You haven't thought about having someone to kiss and hold you tight. Someone who can make you happy and smile."  
>"Not really. It's not like anyone would be interested in me anyone. If you haven't noticed, I'm not your average girl. No guy here is man enough to handle me."<br>"If you say so. I need to find the right guy for me. I'm willing to take a chance on a really good guy and give him an opportunity instead of rejecting them. Maybe I keep rejecting good guys and going out with bad ones."  
>"If you say so." I mirrored what she just said to me. I then sent her a smile which she quickly returned. "I hope you get the love you want, Cupcake. I gotta go to the bathroom. See ya later."<p>

I have thought of love before and being kissed by the right guy. But the only guy, who comes to mind is a certain nub. We've always been "just friends", but normally friends don't kiss. It meant something to me even if it was "just to get it over with." What was the point of kissing in the first place? We would still be without a first kiss to the general public. We promised not to speak of it ever and no one would know. So what was the point? Maybe it was to get all our jitters about kissing out of the way. It was just a practice kiss for when the right person came along and we would be without nerves when it really mattered.

The problem is that kiss mattered to me and it shouldn't have. I can easily point out things I hate about Freddie. Do I hate him? I obviously don't. Why would I spend so much time with him if I hated him? I wouldn't. Freddie knows I don't hate him. Do I love him? I like him (even though I claim to just tolerate him) as a friend. Is there something more? Yes? No? Maybe? There are so many thoughts running through my head causing my brain hurts. I should focus on enjoying the summer.

Freddie POV:  
>I watched Sam leave Carly on her own in the hallway. I need to approach her quick before someone else gets to her. Girls like Carly don't stay single long. I rush up to her and she turns to face me. "Hey Carly," I say while walking towards her.<br>"Hi Freddie" she responds sweetly.  
>"How are you?" I ask her nervously looking down at my feet.<br>"I'm fine. Why are you being so formal?"  
>"No reason. I was thinking..." I started but I drifted off not recalling knowing how to continue.<br>"I'm not surprised you were thinking. That's what people do," she joked with me. I chuckled quietly.  
>"Will you go out with me?" I ask her speedily. My palms are sweating from the nerves. I wipe my hands on my pants. I do this frequently under high stress situations. These situations include: taking test, dealing with bullies (I'm a wimpy nerd... it's gonna happen) and asking out my dream girl. I laugh nervously.<br>"Freddie..."  
>"I know I'm a nerd in AV club with a bunch of losers.<br>"Freddie."  
>"And in the past you have only seen me as a friend," I continued.<br>"Freddie!"  
>"But I can treat you better than any other guy at the school. We belong together!" I ignore her once more.<br>"FREDDIE!" Carly shouted as she interrupted my rant.  
>"Yes?" I ask meekly.<br>"Okay."  
>"Okay?" I respond confused.<br>"I will go out with you."  
>"REALLY?!"<br>"Yes."

This is the moment I've been waiting for my whole life. That is a complete lie. I've only been waiting since 6th grade. Three years was a really long time. It wasn't love at first sight like I've claimed in the past. Sure I initially only wanted to ignore my unnatural and most likely demonic feelings for the spawn of Satan, but I truly like Carly. I think everything she does is cute. There isn't anything about her I don't like. I fell for her honestly, despite my wrong motives to have feelings for her. That was my childlike ignorance and foolishness.

I leaned in. She leaned in. We were so close. Then it happened. I lips met in a short kiss. I tasted her berry lip gloss that was incredibly sticky. It was different than I expected. It certainly wasn't expected. I suddenly hear someone cry out "EWWW!"  
>I looked over and saw the demon herself.<br>"What is going on?!" She cries out in what I assume is horror.  
>"Carly and I were kissing,"I tell her honestly.<br>"Lies. Tell me it's a lie. You were just performing CPR standing."  
>"No, Sam. It's true. Freddie and I are going out now," Carly interjects.<br>"I knew you were going to give some unlikely guys chances, but I didn't expected this. I didn't know you were desperate, Carly."  
>"Why? Are you jealous?" I ask with a smirk."<br>"More like disgusted. I left my jacket in my locker. I come back to get it. I see THAT and now I have urge to vomit!"  
>"I'm gonna go before she vomits on me. Bye guys. Call me later, Freddie." Carly then starts walking to her apartment. This leaves myself alone with Sam.<p>

"What's your problem, Sam?"  
>"I shocked Carly would lower herself to the likes of you."<br>"You don't have to be so rude."  
>"I'm just being honest. Enjoy it while it lasts."<br>"What do you mean?"  
>"No matter how hard we try some good things never last," she sung. Her voice is surprisingly angelic. A demon should not sound so beautiful. It's almost as if the gates of heaven have opened up. I recognized the melody.<br>"Barbra Streisand?"  
>"Nicely done Fredward." She complimented me with a slight smirk. She punched me on the shoulder playfully, but not gently. You are then reminded that the voice of an angel belongs to evil. I winced at the pain.<br>"What can I say? I know my music. I didn't think you were into that stuff though."  
>"I'm unpredictable. I can appreciate a Broadway legend."<br>"Anyway I'm gonna let you ruin this for me."  
>"I don't have too. You'll see the truth. You don't belong together."<br>"Okay. I'm going to change the subject. How do you feel about musicals?"  
>"I'm not a big fan of show tunes. I do enjoy the modern ones on Broadway. Wicked and The Book of Mormon are quite enjoyable. There are some old ones though that I enjoy. The film adaptions are okay like Grease and West Side Story," she responds.<br>"I've never seen either of those films."  
>"Do you live in a whole?"She asks me. I glare at her and see her grin.<br>"My mother doesn't approve of the romance. She thinks it might give me bad ideas."  
>"We have to watch them. Your mom is at an aggressive parenting conference right?" She grins at me with excitement.<br>"Yeah?"  
>"I'll come over tonight."<br>"Come at like 7. This way we'll have time to watch both movies and talk," I tell her.  
>"Talk?" She sounded confused.<br>"We can talk about anything. I'd like to talk about music. It would be just like the old days."  
>"Okay. It's a date. I'm going to the Groovy Smoothie." She walks off. "I took your wallet by the way," she calls over her shoulder as she bounces away.<p>

I inwardly groaned. Then I realized her words. I am going out with Carly. I have a date with Sam. It's not really a date. It's just an expression. It's completely innocent. And why does it make me so nervous? We're just hanging out. We just started dating. Not me and Sam. Me and Carly. Too many thoughts. I need to get home.

AN: The remainder of this story will take place between the summer between 9th and 10th grade. Review if you want more! PM me if you have any questions. Next Chapter will look into Sam's home life and her "date" with Freddie.


	5. A Date Between Friends

You better shape up  
>'Cause I need a man<br>And my heart is set on you  
>You better shape up<br>You better understand  
>To my heart I must be true<br>Nothing left  
>Nothing left for me to do<br>Olivia Newton-John and John Travolta -You're the one that I want

Sam POV:  
>I went home after school expecting to come home to a a dirty house that appears to be vacant. My mother is never home anymore. She seems to disappear often. As I opened the door, I was surprised at the sight. The house looks it cleanest. The last time it was this tidy was a month ago. I instantly knew what this means. This social worker is coming. She comes to "assure my happiness" and to make sure I am in a "safe environment." Having a drunk for a mother doesn't lead to happiness and it certainly does not promote safety. I see my mother in the kitchen cooking for the first time in what feels like forever.<br>"When is she coming?" I ask her.  
>"When is who coming?" She replies dumbly. I'm not stupid. I have no idea why she wouldn't think I would put it all together on my own.<br>"The social worker. How much time do I have to prepare?"  
>"She'll be here in a half an hour. Be on your best behavior or else," she warns me. I never really take her seriously. If it were to go badly, she would just get drunk. The she would pass out. She can't hurt anyone unconscious. My mother is no threat to me.<br>"Yes, Mom," I say meekly. I turn away ready to go to my room to escape her ridiculousness. She stops me with her voice.  
>"I was contacted by Melanie's school today." Oh the perfect princess. What has she done now? Most schools call home, when a student does something wrong. That is never the case her I wonder what award she one this time for her "brilliance."<br>"Oh," I respond.  
>"They have a proposition for you," my mom says. I look at her with curiosity.<br>"What kind of proposition?"  
>"The want to offer you a performing arts scholarship to the academy. Melanie has apparently shown her theater teacher that web show you do. He claims you have a knack for theatricality. She told him of your pageant days. They WANT you, Sam." An opportunity to go to one of the best schools in the world has come knocking. Can I leave? No, I have to much to lose. I can't lose my friends or the web show that has made me famous.<br>"No. I can't go," I tell her firmly.  
>"Why not?" she asks confused.<br>"I have too much to lose."  
>"If your talking about your friends, we all know they'll abandon you eventually. They are too good for you, but you are gifted. Go to London. Rose Girls Academy will love you."<br>"You just don't want the responsibility of being a mother."  
>"Very true,"she comments. She then takes a sip of her mug. It's not liquor. I can tell from the steam coming from it. I assume its coffee. "Motherhood is too much work."<br>I scoffed at her honesty. "You make me sick."  
>"Too bad you'll end up just like me. All alone. Like mother, like daughter." I finally go to escape to my prison cell often referred to as my bedroom and wait for hours before I go to Freddie's.<p>

Time passes. I am filled with excitement. The meeting with the social worker was normal. She asked the same questions about my mother and her abilities as a parent. I could have been honest and told of her lack of parenting skills, but then I would be taken away. If I wanted to leave, I would just go to the boarding school. Mom brought it up again in front of the social worker. I told he I was too happy here to abandon my mother. Mom said I have till the end of the summer (just 8 weeks) to agree. She mentioned a mandatory audition even though I was already accepted. She said it had something to do with measuring talent and placement.

My thoughts wander back to the nub. Freddie. So sweet and caring. Too kind and gentle. Despite these good traits, he is also so naive and gullible. Oh naive little Freddie. I trust him though. I know I can tell him anything, if I needed too. But I can't. I don't want to drag him into my secrets. He is too sheltered to know of my life completely. He knows it is dysfunctional, but not to the extent. He doesn't know that by walking home I'm risking the chance of being mugged. He doesn't know going to Carly's at night makes me available to the advances of creepers. He doesn't know that my mother's "boyfriends" (more honestly they are lovers) have tried to touch me in more intimate places from the norm. It's a quarter to 6pm. I begin my walk to his apartment.

I try to avoid the alley ways that would make it a faster walk. Danger lurks inside them and I rather not risk it. I walk down main streets. I am fully aware that I am going to be late. He knows I won't be on time anyway. Taking this route is safer. The sky hasn't darkened. Creepers are scarce. I still was approached by a few perverted graduates from Ridgeway. I threatened to cut their balls off with my pocket knife. That scared them off. I enter Bushwell and go to the elevator. I approach Freddie's apartment and pull out my bobbie pin from my hair. Why would I knock when I can pick the lock?  
>I enter and see Freddie on his couch.<br>"'Sup Fredweird."  
>"Sam?! How did you get in here?"<br>I lifted my bobbie pin and replied, "Do you know me?"  
>He accepts this as an answer. "I made popcorn."<br>"I brought the movies," I responded. "Make me some bacon while I start with Grease."

Freddie and I sat in silence as we watched the film. The movie was coming to an end and I decided to speak. "How did you like it?" I ask him.  
>"It was extremely corny, but I can see the appeal."<br>"I think it's stupid and sends the wrong message."  
>"What do you mean?" He sounds confused. What messages could I possibly get from a cheesy 70s musical film?<br>"It's promoting people changing who they are to appeal to others. She had to become someone else to be with the one she loved. If they truly loved you, they wouldn't make you change."  
>"They were both willing to change for each other. He almost became a jock earlier in the film."<br>"It doesn't matter. They shouldn't have to."  
>"Why is that?" I hear him ask another question.<br>"They are complete opposites. They come from completely different worlds and they found love. They felt the need to change because other people expected them to stick to their own kind. It shouldn't matter how others feel. It's a relationship between two people not Danny and Sandy and all their friends. By changing themselves, they aren't who they fell in love with in the first place."  
>"Wow." He looks stunned and his eyes widened. "That's deep."<br>"Well I'm not shallow."  
>"I didn't say you were."<br>"You just sounded surprised my insight."  
>"I know you're smart. You just chose to present yourself as an aggressive girl with an appetite. You're more than that. I'm just shocked you broke that barrier." Then there was a silence. He reached to insert the next DVD. "What would you do if you fell in love with your exact opposite?"<br>He thinks and then he answers. "I wouldn't want them to change. Who cares what others think? I want to love the person for who they truly are."  
>"That's smart." We sit back and enjoy West Side Story.<p>

"It almost reminds me of Grease," Freddie comments.  
>"What?"<br>"Two people from different worlds come together and find love."  
>"You're right. It's about breaking down stereotypes. It's seeing beyond the image shown to the world and falling in love with who they truly are. They can be themselves when they are alone. In public, they put on masks. When they expected to hate one another, they find themselves in a tragic romance," I agree with him. I pull a strand of hair behind my hair. "I wonder if it's worth it," I continue.<br>"Opposites attract, you know." His head turned towards me. He looked into my eyes.  
>"There has to be more to a relationship than attraction."<br>"Wouldn't the opposites be intrigued by each other. They would be continuously fascinated with one another thoughts and opinions. There is never a dull moment," He argues. We continue with the debate.  
>"Yes but it would lead to a lot of arguments and battles. Would the be better off finding someone more like them?"<br>"If they are happy and in love, arguing doesn't matter" he replies. His eyes were burning with passion.  
>"What if you just want peace?" I ask forcefully.<br>"That doesn't sound like you. You like excitement risk." He sounded upset and troubled by something.  
>"Then my opposite wouldn't. He wouldn't want me even if I did. You don't want such a relationship."<br>"Not necessarily. Getting along with a girl who think similarly could get boring."  
>"It doesn't matter anyway. You have Carly anyway. You are already in a relationship. She is your "future wife" after all. There is no point in arguing. Why are you pushing this?"<br>"You're right. I have Carly. I just find the idea of love/hate relationships romantics. They have so many faults. Alone they are so imperfect. Together they are perfectly in love and ultimately complete each other. They come together as one. They can list everything they hate about each other but love all of those things more.I t doesn't matter. I'm not looking for a relationship, when I am already in one."

That ends our debate. We both agree that it is completely useless to argue. The entire thing is meaningless. The relationship between myself and Freddie proves my point. We would never work as a couple. The awkwardness went away at the end of the movie. For the rest of night, we talked about music. I went through Freddie's pearpod to judge his taste. I was slightly impressed with the addition of the album Joshua Tree by U2. We debated the grade of Prince & The Revolution's album  
>Purple Rain. Freddie liked it more than me. We agreed on the awesomness of Murmur by R.E.M. Overall it was a good night.<p>

It was late and Freddie didn't want me to walk home. He is too much of a gentleman for his own good. I told him I'd break into Carly's and sleep on her couch, which I did. I'll just tell her one of my mom's boyfriends was being creepy. At the end, I really wanted to kiss him. There was one problem. Carly. She is my best friend. I love her like a sister, but she is Freddie's girlfriend. I'm not. I gave him a hug. He held me close. It wasn't awkward like I thought it would be. We separated and I punched his shoulder the way I always did. We told each other goodnight. I really miss the old days.

AN: Review! Follow it! Tell me if you want more! Criticism? Praise? I want it all!


	6. While she is gone

Can anybody find me somebody to love?  
>Each morning I get up I die a little<br>Can barely stand on my feet  
>Take a look in the mirror and cry<br>Lord what you're doing to me  
>I have spent all my years in believing you<br>But I just can't get no relief,  
>Lord!<br>Somebody, somebody  
>Can anybody find me somebody to love?<br>Queen -Somebody to love

Freddie POV:  
>It's been a week since I've seen Carly. Carly. My girlfriend. I haven't seen her since the day after the last week of school. We have been together a week and I've barely seen her. She was away visiting her grandfather in Yakima. I can't say I missed her much. That doesn't mean I don't care. We've been talking on the phone every night and our conversations are brief. We text all the time, but the time periods between these messages are long. I've been rather occupied to be honest. I've been spending time trying to keep Sam out of trouble.<p>

Sam. My first friend in Seattle. My first crush. My first kiss. My best friend. In Carly's absence we've gotten closer. It is almost like it was years ago. Every time I would bring up Carly, Sam would laugh. She claims our relationship isn't real. I obviously defended our relationship and say it is. She says we are no different as a couple than we are as friends. I say that makes us closer than most couples. She says we haven't been on a real date yet. I told her we went to the movies and then the Groovy Smoothie before she left. Sam retorts saying we (Sam and I) do that all the time and we are NOT dating. I realized she kinda has a point. Even though she criticizes our relationship, Sam gave us her blessing yesterday.

_Sam and are were sitting on the old swing set at the playground where we met. We were listening to Anyway you want it by Journey on my pear phone. I look over. I was missing the presence of my girlfriend. "I can't wait for Carly to get back."  
>Sam sighed and turned her head to look forward in to the sky. "Do you care about her?"<br>"Of course I do," I respond. She closed her eyes.  
>"Freddork, promise me you'll never hurt her intentionally." She looks last time she looked so serious was when she came to me for help with Missy. She was sad and felt alone. Another time was when we were on the fire escape. She apologized and felt guilty for her actions. I know she cares about me he way I care about her. The fire escape. The apology. The kiss. Thoughts run through my head, and then I answer her.<br>"I promise."  
>"Promise me you won't let her change you."<br>"What?"  
>"You're insecure. It's obvious. You don't know if you can measure up to other guys. Maybe part of that is my fault. Maybe you believe the lies I've told you about not being good enough for anyone. You are better than that. You compare yourself to her other boyfriends. Don't. Just be Freddie."<br>"I promise."  
>"Good." The wind blows on her face. Her hair dances around her as she swings higher. "If this is best for the happiness of both you and Carly, I will give you my blessing."<br>"Really?"  
>"Yes. I am willing to put aside the nausea I feel thinking of you and Carly as a couple for your happiness."<br>"Are you sure you aren't jealous?" I joke with her.  
>"Are you sure you don't want me to vomit all over you?" She smirks and grins at the sun in her face. She keeps her eyes closed and enjoyed the heat. We sat there swinging util we decided to go to the Groovy Smoothie.<em>

I've been spending a lot of alone time with Sam lately. Who else am I going to hang with? Gibby? He's either spending his time at the beach where he can be shirtless without shame or bathing in liquid soap. Shane? He still refuses to speak tome. He said I put him in danger y introducing him to those "lunatic girls." Jonah and I aren't friends anymore after the whole incident with Sam. I kinda blame myself for that. They wouldn't have been together if I hadn't introduced them. He really hurt Sam even though she would never admit it. I'm friends with a whole lot of guys like Rodney and Wesley and the nerds from the AV club (who am I to judge). None of them are as fun as Sam.

Right now we are just chilling in my apartment and sitting on my couch. My mom isn't home. She is busy working the night shift at the hospital. Sam wouldn't be here if my mom was. She's wearing a plain blue tank top. She has on shorts that show off her legs. I wonder how such a petite girl can have legs that look like they can go on and on for miles. I convinced to watch the original Galaxy Wars with me. I bribed her actually. I promised her ham and bacon and popcorn. She said she'll watch it with me,if we can watch the original Texas Chain Saw Massacre from 1974. I'm wearing my blue Galaxy Wars shirt with jean shorts. Sam said that I looked more like a nub than usual. Galaxy Wars is almost over and Sam is sleeping on my shoulder. It's not a bad feeling, being so close to her. I miss feeling so close to her emotionally. I nudge her head to wake her up. She groaned, "What?"  
>"The movie is almost over."<br>"Thank God," she said with a grin.  
>"You slept through most of it."<br>"It was boring me. It's not my fault." She closed her eyes. Her face was in deep thought.

"What are you thinking right now?"  
>"Freddie, I have a confession." She sighed and looked away from me. "Remember how we vowed to be solely dedicated to 70s and 80s music."<br>"Yeah?" I think I know where this is going.  
>"I broke the vow." She continued, "I like music from 60s to 2000s."<br>"That's not bad, Sam."  
>"Yes it is. I feel like I'm cheating on my two favorite decades of music."<br>"All that matters is that they are your favorite. To be honest, I find myself liking recent music too."  
>"How could you? That stuff is garbage."<br>"Most of it is garbage. Some of it is quite good. What song are you thinking of?"  
>"Make You Feel My Love... Don't you hate me?" She responded, while dramatically flailing her arms.<br>"I could never hate you. Bob Dylan is a classic. I can't blame you."  
>"The Adele version. It almost makes want to cry."My eyes widened in shock.<br>"Why? You never cry," I ask her.  
>"I can connect to it in a way."<br>"How?" Is Sam in love? With who?  
>"It's personal." That's classic Sam. She rarely want's to open up.<br>"You know you can trust me." I know all about her trust issues rooting from her dad.  
>"I just want someone to care for me the way people do in songs and in films. I want to be loved and I don't want to end up alone," she says with her eyes still closed.<br>"Why do you think that?"  
>"Everyone leaves me. You and Carly will too and go off to some fancy college and forget about me."<br>"Even if I leave, I will never forget about you. We will always be friends."  
>"Promise?" Her eyes open. Her crystal blue eyes appear glossy. She looks to be almost on the verge of tears. I know she wouldn't cry in front of me though.<br>"Promise." I smile at her and she quickly returns it.  
>"Get ready for some HORROR!" She screams and I laughed.<p>

After the films, Sam and I eased into our bickering routine. It was more playful than usual. We debated decades of music. I favored music from the 60s. Sam claims 90s music was better. This continued until it was late. She wanted to leave before my mother came. It was early enough for her to catch the bus so she left. I found myself alone in my room missing her presence.

I wonder if she is in love. Sam is an attractive girl. I would have to be blind not to notice. Puberty was kind to her. She grew curves where most girls including Carly would be jealous. I am no perv. I'm just observant. Her blonde her glows in the light. The sun makes her look almost angelic. Those icy eyes of blue and gray go into your soul. They give me chills. Her smile brightens a room with eyes. She was easily a desirable girl, even if she tried to hide under layers and hoodies. Boys are just intimidated by her personality. Guys that aren't want to "tame" her. Sam doesn't need to change. She deserves better than those jerks.

Who could she have feelings for? She has to like someone. Going out with boys isn't really her thing. Ever since Pete, she hasn't spoken of anyone else. She vowed to never alter her appearance for a guy again. They aren't worth it. I sat there thinking of Sam's mystery guy. I started wondering why the thought of him gave me a nasty feeling in the pit of my stomach. Seven more weeks of summer left to go.

Carly returns from Yakima tomorrow. I have to spend more time with her. Carly. My girlfriend. Not Sam. Sam. Her love. I wonder who has earned her heart. She doesn't fall for guys easily. She's not like Carly. All a guy needs is to be hot to earn the affections of Carly. I don't really qualify. I need to stop thinking of Sam. I just need to focus on my girlfriend, Carly, and plan our first real date.

AN: I wonder how Carly feels about her man getting so close to her best friend. Review! The more reviews= the quicker I update. What did you like? Do you have any ideas for the story? Praise? Criticism? Review!


	7. Missing a father

It was the third of September  
>That day I'll always remember, yes I will<br>Cause that was the day, that my daddy died  
>I never got a chance to see him<br>Never heard nothin' but bad things about him  
>Momma I'm depending on you, to tell me the truth<br>Momma just hung her head and said, "Son,  
>Papa was a rolling stone, (my son)<br>Where ever he laid his hat was his home  
>and when he died, all he left us was alone"<br>The Temptations -Papa Was A Rollin' Stone

Sam POV:

I can't do this. I can't keep pretending to not feel. I feel something. I feel something for someone. I shouldn't feel this way. I shouldn't feel this way for him. I should hate him. Everyone with common sense knows I don't. The others are oblivious. I say I hate him all the time. It's just meaningless words. I don't mean them. I know he doesn't mean them either. We obviously don't hate each other. To others, it's just mutual toleration. We don't like each other according to others. We were only friends because of her. She is what keeps us together. We are nothing without her. They are so wrong. We are nothing with her. She separates us. His feelings for her prevent him from possibly loving me. He can't love me.

My mind always goes back to him. Freddie. He is with her. Carly. They are together. There is no me and him. It's all Carly and Freddie. They belong together. They are happy. I guess the best relationships come from friendship. I am alone. I hate this empty feeling. I can finally admit it. I like him. Freddie. I like Freddie. It's not love. It's just a crush. I's a thing I can get over. I can move on from this. I don't have to feel this way every time I see them together. I lost my best friends. Both of them. All she does is talk about him now. Where did these feeling come from? She certainly never felt them before. I suspect it just her desire to be desired. It reminds me of a film, A Streetcar Named Desire, based on a play from the 1940s. The main character, Blanche DuBois, lives for male attention. She's shallow and materialistic. Blanche has that in common with her. They grew up without a struggle in the world. She is different from Blanche though. Carly is sweet and caring. A genuinely good person. She is manipulative. She uses his affections towards her to get what she wants.

I find it hard to talk to her now. She claims it love. Ha. Love. What is love? Is love even real? If it is, look at the divorce rate and tell me what went wrong. It certainly wasn't love at first sight. Not for her. He knew from the start. He admired her from the beginning. Freddie knew the belonged together. I was wrong.I though it would be over in a week. It's been two. When will it end? Will the end? Will they be together forever? I've been laying in bed all day. I told Carly it was cramps from my time of the month. I'm really just avoiding them. My phone rings and I see it's her calling.

"Hello?" I answer.

"Sam!"  
>"Calm down, Carly. What's wrong?"<p>

"It's Freddie." I become overwhelmed with worry.

"What's wrong with him?"

"He's been out on the fire escape since midnight."  
>"What time is it now?"<br>"7:15 pm. He refuses to come home."  
>"Over Nineteen hours! What's the date?" I think I know the problem.<p>

"July 6th. Why does it matter? What should I do? His mom won't tell me anything. I'm his girlfriend I need to help him. " I know. He loves you. He doesn't love me. I hear my heart breaking. I can't show it.

"You helped him by calling me. I'll handle him. He'll be back in his apartment by morning."  
>"That long?! What are you gonna do?"<p>

"Don't question my methods. I'll help Freddie." I hang up on her. I don't feel like answering questions. The first time this happened was almost 3 years ago. I put on a black and white striped T-shirt and white shorts. I got ready to go thinking of the memory.

_He was sitting on top of the slide. I looked sad and depressed. He was looking towards the clouds in deep thought. He was wearing a black polo with jeans. I approach him wearing my bag full of CDs. I wore a yellow t-shirt with jean shorts. Two months before Carly. "Hey" I greet him._

_"Hi," he responds quickly. His voice is soft.  
>"Freddie, what's wrong?" His eyes widened. He turned his head to face me.<br>"You called me Freddie." He looked confused.  
>"Well it is your name."<br>"You never call me by name. Why?"_

_"You look upset. I wouldn't mess with you, if something was bothering you."  
>"Why?" he asks again.<br>"Your my friend and I don't want you to be upset. Can you tell me what's wrong?"  
>"It's my father's birthday."<em>

_"Oh. I see why you are upset. How do you feel?"_

_"I try not to think about him. I feel a burning sensation in m chest. It's almost as if my heart is going to explode. I miss him so much. I don't want to cry."  
>"Sometimes it's okay to shed some tears. Can I play you a song?"<br>"Yeah, I guess." I went through my bag and pulled out my old CD player and some ear buds. Inside my bag are a bunch of CDs. I grab one and it put in the CD player. It belonged to my mom. The music isn't really my style but it has meaning.  
>"This is my mom's CD. I grabbed it earlier today. It's not from the 70s or 80s. It came out a few years ago. Just listen." He nodded as a response. The voice of Luther Vandross came through the earbuds.<em>

_Back when I was a child, before life removed all the innocence_

_My father would lift me high and dance with my mother and me and then_

_Spin me around 'til I fell asleep_

_Then up the stairs he would carry me_

_And I knew for sure I was loved_

_If I could get another chance, another walk, another dance with him_

_I'd play a song that would never, ever end_

_How I'd love, love, love_

_To dance with my father again_

_Freddie's eye began to gloss over. He was going to cry. I had to comfort him. He's my friend that's what friends do. He held himself and I began to rub his back. I wanted to help him._

_When I and my mother would disagree_

_To get my way, I would run from her to him_

_He'd make me laugh just to comfort me_

_Then finally make me do just what my mama said_

_Later that night when I was asleep_

_He left a dollar under my sheet_

_Never dreamed that he would be gone from me_

_If I could steal one final glance, one final step, one final dance with him_

_I'd play a song that would never, ever end_

_'Cause I'd love, love, love_

_To dance with my father again_

_He started to cry. Freddie couldn't be strong anymore. Tears ran from his eyes down to his cheeks. I hugged him for __the first time ever. A chill ran down my spine. He held on to me as a comforted him._

_Sometimes I'd listen outside her door_

_And I'd hear how my mother cried for him_

_I pray for her even more than me_

_I pray for her even more than me_

_I know I'm praying for much too much_

_But could you send back the only man she loved_

_I know you don't do it usually_

_But dear Lord she's dying_

_To dance with my father again_

_Every night I fall asleep and this is all I ever dream_

_He remained in my arms until the sun went down. We didn't speak to each other. The only time I let go of him was when I switched CDs after the song to Imagine by John Lennon. His mom came to bring us home._

I left my home and took a bus to Bushwell. I climbed the stairs till I reached the eighth floor. I picked the lock on Freddie's door and saw his mother praying at the kitchen table. She looked at me. She knew why I was there. I ran to his room and went through his bag. I grabbed his wallet. I turned and walked to the fire escape of the Benson's apartment. I saw him staring out at the traffic and gray sky. He was wearing his "Liquid Ham" penny tee. "It's beautiful," I say. I can tell I startled him.  
>"Yeah...It is," he said looking at me.<br>"Are you okay?"I ask him.  
>"I will be."<br>"You're right." I pause and then continue "I'll make sure of it."  
>"What do you mean?" He sounded confused.<br>"Come with me."  
>"I'm not coming inside."<br>"I know and you're not going to till later. What time is it?"  
>"8 pm."<br>"Twelve hours. You and me. We are going on an adventure."  
>"What?"<br>"Your dad's birthday is tomorrow. You're depressed. You'll be home by 8 am. I'll text Carly to tell your mom that you're with me."  
>"What are we gonna do?"<br>"In the next 12 hours we are going to celebrate your dad's birthday."  
>"Why do you sound so concerned?"<br>"You're my friend. I have a plan. Here's your wallet. I brought my emergency money. Let's go. If your back by 8 am you can spend the rest of the day with your mom honoring your father. Come on."I handed him his wallet that had $50 in it. His mother gives him the money in case there is an emergency. I consider his mental health to be an emergency. We climbed down the fire ready for the adventure I have planned.

AN: How much do you love Seddie? The adventure Sam has planned is in Freddie's POV next chapter. You want more! Review! I plan on updating with Chapter 8 in two days. It's a long one.


	8. An Adventure

It won't be long, yes, till you're alone

When your lover, oh, he hasn't come home

Cause he's lovin', who he's touchin',

He's squeezin' another

Journey -Lovin', Touchin', Squeezin'

Freddie POV:

Friend. What is a friend? Someone I can confide in. Someone I can feel comfortable with. Someone who I can trust. Someone who is there for me, when I need them. A person with common interests. Someone who can make me smile even when I try to. Sam. Does she really qualify as a friend? She's my best friend. Usually around this time of year, I go into solitude. I shut the people I care most for out. I make up some nerdy excuse for where I was those days to Carly. Sam knew better. I didn't tell Carly. I don't want her sympathy or pity. Sam doesn't pity me. She just wants to make me laugh. Usually, she'll leave a CD I personally wouldn't listen to in my room. Last year she gave me It Takes a Nation of Millions to Hold Us Back by Public Enemy. Hip Hop isn't my usual taste. Shocking as it is,I loved it. I needed the rough sound to deal with my anger. I was angry at my dad for dying. I'm not now I just miss him. It hurts more now, especially knowing its been so long since I heard his voice.

Sam used her pass to get on the city bus. I used my own money to pay my way. Twenty minutes later and we are on the other side of Seattle. I never come out this way. It's not necessarily a bad area. It's just not the safest. It's popular for crazy night life. She brings me to a place and I read the sign, "Karaoke Dokie." It's a karaoke joint for 18 and under. I've heard of the place, but have never been primarily due to my lack o musical ability. I rather not make a fool out of myself.

I turn and see Sam speaking to a man at the DJ booth. She returns and says, "here we are. Follow me. I'll find us a table."  
>I follow her directions and ask her a question. "Why are we here?"<br>"For entertainment, of course." She shrugged and smiled at me.  
>"We're not singing, are we?" I know my voice sounds nervous from the way it cracks.<br>Sam replies, "Relax, nub. Let's have some fun. We can share a basket of buffalo nuggets." She tucked a piece of hair behind her ear before continuing, "How's Carly? Is being with her everything you imagined?"  
>"Carly's fine. I imagined perfection, but nothing is ever perfect. I never realized how bossy she is, until now."<p>

"You never noticed. You're her servant boyfriend. You live to please her and she gives you kisses. I can't believe you are so oblivious."  
>"I am no servant. Carly is not my master. I just hate going to Build-a-Bra and Glitter Gloss all the time."<br>"Carly wears the pants in your relationship. The second she says, 'Please, for me?', you go bow down to her and do whatever she says. You did that before you two dated. It's worse now," she comments.  
>"I can where the pants in the relationship." I quickly protest.<br>"No you can't. You don't have a dominant personality. How was your first date with her? Tell me what happened. I personally believe Carly changed some details."  
>"On Thursday, we went for an art walk through Pioneer Square and had lunch at a near by cafe. It was nice and simple."<br>"How did that go?" Why is she so curious about my relationship with Carly.  
>"I wanted to hear her opinions about the art, but I should have known better. I'm not a very creative so I wanted to hear a different perspective. I wanted to know if she could give the art a bigger meaning. All I got from her was 'that's pretty' or 'I like it' or 'that's not really my style.' I then remembered Carly isn't really that artistic."<br>"Don't you remember her firefighter bunny?" she asked.  
>"I do now." We both laughed.<p>

We continued to talk about different topics. W discussed our plans for the rest of summer break, iCarly skirts, and some MMA fights. The entire time I was laughing about Sam's dramatic outburst when I asked her to chose between ham and bacon. Don't question her meat. We criticized some of the awful singing performances. Overtime I began to wonder why was I here with her. Carly and my mom tried to bring me inside. Sam wanted to take me out into the world. It was her different approach that appealed to me. If it wasn't for her, I would probably still be on the fire escape. I then heard the DJ say, "Freddie Benson and Sam Puckett, come on down." I was about to protest, when Sam grabbed my arm and pulled me upon stage. I was handed a microphone and so was she. I didn't know what we were supposed to be singing until the music started.

I recognize the song playing and begin to sing shyly, "_just a small town girl, livin' in a lonely world, she took the midnight train goin' anywhere._"Sam laughs and sings her lines."J_ust a city boy, born and raised in south Detroit, he took the midnight train goin' anywhere._" Her voice gives me the confidence to sing a bit stronger, "_a singer in a smoky room_." Sam's melodic voice fills the room, "a_ smell of wine and cheap perfume_." We sing in unison, "_For a smile they can share the night. It goes on and on and on and on. Strangers waiting, up and down the boulevard. Their shadows searching in the night. Streetlights people living just to find emotion, hiding somewhere in the night._" Sam begins to dance in circles while she sings, "_working hard to get my fill. Everybody wants a thrill._" My voice joins hers,"_payin' anything to roll the dice just one more time._"

Sam is obviously the better singer. I could barely hear her over the applause of the audience, "_some will win._"

I twirl Sam around and we sing together, "_some will lose. Some were born to sing the blues. Oh, the movie never ends. It goes on and on and on and on. Strangers waiting, up and down the shadows searching in the night. Streetlight people, living just to find emotion, hiding somewhere in the night._" The audience members sing along at the ending, "_don't stop believin'._" Sam and I sing "_hold on to that feelin'_." The chants of the audience members continue, "s_treetlight people. Don't stop believin'_."We repeat our line "_hold on to that feelin'._" The entire audience sing the last lines with us. "_Streetlight people... Don't stop!_"

We got off stage and I say, "that was more fun than I thought it would be."  
>"I knew it would be." Sam goes to the table and grabs her bag and says, "I gotta make a call. I'll be right back." I see her run to the bathroom with her bag in her hand and I wait for her return. Moments later the bathroom door opens and out steps a goddess. The goddess regularly referred to as a blonde headed demon. She was wearing a black super short and tight strapless mini dress and he converse. I had to smile at her shoe choice. It was so Sam. What am I doing with such a hot girl? "Come on," she tells me. She then walks out the door. I chase after her.<br>I ask, "Where are we going?"  
>"It's a surprise. Don't worry. It's only two blocks away." We reach the building. I recognize it as a dance club for 18+ that serves alcohol.<br>"Sam, No!" I tell her.  
>"Freddork, live a little. I promise we won't drink any alcoholic beverages. You need a bracelet to get served at the bar anyway." She grabs my arm again and pulls me to the back of the building. No one is back here. I see her knock on the door. I bald muscular man in a black shirt opens the door. Sam calls out to him, "Hey Sandy."<br>"'Sup Samazing."  
>"Are you letting us in?" She asks.<br>"Are you gonna tell your mom to call me?"  
>"Duh," Sam responds.<br>"Come on in," the scary guy identified as Sandy says.

We step in and I see bright lights flashing. It almost blinds me. The music is booming and fast paced. I follow Sam to the center of the dance floor. She starts swaying her hips back and forth. I just stand there watching her. She doesn't stop shaking her hips. She looks up and sees me. "Dance with me."  
>"I'm not the best dancer."<br>"I'll teach you." I nod my head as a response. She turns around her back facing me. She grabs my hands. I put them on her waist. She lowers my hands to her hips. "Just go with the flow," she tells me. She begins to grind and back in tome. Her body rubs up against mine. My hormones are out of control. I need to get a grip. I stare at her in shock. I gain a slight bit of confidence and begin to move with her. We've been dancing for about an hour. We didn't change positions. I felt comfortable being this close to Sam. I begin to move my hands up and down her legs. She stops and I get nervous. I'm worried I did something wrong. She whips her hair around and turns her body to face me. "It's midnight."  
>"Happy Birthday, Dad". She goes to an empty table knowing I'll follow.<br>A waitress comes and takes our order for drinks. All we got was Peppy Cola. There would be no alcohol tonight.  
>"Are you okay?" Sam asks concerned.<br>"I'm having fun." We sit there talking a bit about. The music they play. Sam and I are just sitting at a table in an adult dance club talking about our taste in music. She smiles and I grin back. She stands up and drags me back to the dance floor. She wraps her arms around my neck. I instinctively grab her hips and pull her closer. We are facing each other. She begins to grind against me. I look into her eyes and see her staring back at me. We are almost chest to chest. This isn't an innocent dance, but one full of lust. The thought sounds silly. Sam lusting for me. Never. Puberty did make me taller. I am 5 ft and 8 inches. I'm not the tallest guy. I've been working out so I have lean muscles and pretty nice biceps. Still, why would Sam want me. We stay like this for another hour and a half or so.

Some random guy approaches us and says, "may I cut in?" He is slurring his words. Sam and I stop dancing.  
>"I'm not interested," Sam tells him.<br>"Come on, baby. I just want to dance."  
>"No!" she stares him down.<br>"You're coming with me!" He grabs her wrist.  
>"Dude, let go," Sam growls at him.<br>I decide to cut in "I believe the lady said no." Sam looks at me in disbelief.  
>"This is none of your business," the guy rants.<br>"Really?"  
>"Yeah," he replies.<br>"She's a lady and ladies shouldn't be messed with." I act on instinct and punch him in the face. I see Sam's expression. It's a mixture of shock and confusion. Her eyes were as wide as plates. I drag her to the nearest exit.

"It's 2:30 in the morning," I say to her.  
>"I guess it was time to leave anyway." She responds and then continues, "Why did you hit him?"<br>"He was hurting you." It was obvious she was in danger. I wanted to protect her.  
>"I didn't need your help. I can take care of myself." Why does Sam always have to be so strong?<br>"I know that, but you don't always have to. What's next on our adventure?"  
>"I'll call a cab to take us to our next location."<br>The cab comes fifteen minutes later and we are at our destination in twenty more minutes.

I recognize the location. I see the green grass, the swing set, and the slide. It's the playground. I almost want to call it our place. We have so many memories here. So do a lot of other people. This place is special. It's like sacred or holy ground. "I brought music. We need to calm down, so we're gonna listen in silence." We sat on the swings like we used to listening to 80s music. We listened to 3 albums including Madonna's self-titled debut album, Bruce Springsteen's Born in the U.S.A., and War by U2. It was silent as Sam requested. We just enjoyed each other's presence. "One last stop. Follow me, nerd," Sam demands after a little over 2 hours pass. I as usual comply. I find myself at another familiar location. I'm almost disappointed. We climb up the fire escape until we reach the one for my apartment. "It's not over yet, nub."  
>"What do you mean?" She sits down and motions for me to join her. She grabs her bag and pulls something out.<br>"I took this from you a while ago." It was my laptop!  
>"I thought I lost it!" I yell.<br>"Quiet down, nub. We have time to watch another of the many Galaxy Wars films before you go inside."  
>"Really?"<br>"Really." She leans into my arm for support. She stays awake and watches the whole film with me. She made the predictable Sam comments about how nerdy it was. Her head rested on my shoulder. I'm gonna hate, when this is film ends and it's five minutes before 8 a.m. "Are you ready to go inside?"  
>"Yeah. I think I am."<br>"How are you feeling?"  
>"Better. Thanks to you." I grin and she laughs.<br>"I'm gonna take the bus home and eat some bacon. I'll see you around."  
>"Bye Sam," I tell her. Then I hug her close. I let go before I make her uncomfortable. She leaves and I go inside. I walk directly to my room and fall asleep. I can deal with my mother later. I think my Dad would be proud of my choice of friends.<p>

AN: I have officially decided it is best to write a sequel for this story. It doesn't end here. I didn't want to make this story super long. There are a lot more chapters (7 or 8) on the way. Review for more! Any ideas!


	9. Beach day

Summer lovin', had me a blast  
>Summer lovin', happened so fast<br>Met a girl crazy for me  
>Met a boy cute as can be<br>Summer days drifting away  
>To, uh oh, those summer nights<br>John Trovolta & Olivia Newton-John -Summer Nights

Sam POV:

It's been two weeks since my adventure with Freddie. We've been asked a lot of questions. Carly, Spencer and Ms. Benson have been hounding us with questions. They were wondering where we were fro 12 hours. I kept Carly informed throughout the hours to tell her we were still alive, when Freddie wasn't paying attention. Spencer lost interest first and he was just concerned with our safety. Ms. Benson eventually gave up hope to find accepted Freddie was alive and well. He was also no longer depressed which she was very happy about. Carly still hasn't given up hope. She was worried about her boyfriend. She still doesn't know why he was acing like that. He's protecting her emotionally. She isn't capable of handling sadness. I understand her worry. If my boyfriend spent 12 hours with another girl alone, I would be worried. Both me and Freddie, kept our mouths shut.

I doubt she would want to hear about the lustful dance I shared with her boyfriend. It didn't mean anything anyway. He's not attracted to me. He likes prissy girly girls. Look at his girlfriend. I was wearing a dress, but I wasn't girly. I was still very impressed with how Freddie became a bad ass and punched that guy. I could have done it and broke his that matters is that the creep faced some pain. I found the dork very attractive in that moment. I would have jumped his bones right there if he didn't pull me out of the building. This crush on him hasn't worn off yet.

I'm not sure crush is the right word. I think he's cute and sweet. He's funny in his own way. The world looks different in his eyes. I like showing him my perspective. Maybe it's just physical attraction. It wouldn't be so far fetched to say he is hot. At least i think he's hot. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I can't speak for everyone else and their opinions. Only 4 more weeks of summer. These past two weeks have included movies on Carly's couch, filming our web show, witnessing Carly and Freddie flirting, me going numb to it all, and shopping with Carly. Their relationship doesn't bother me as much if I just ignore it. Today, Spencer is dropping the three of us off at the beach.

"Thanks for the ride, Spence" Carly said to her brother as she got out of the car.  
>"No problem, kiddo. See you guys later," he responded and then drove away.<br>"Who wants to go for a walk?" I ask my friends who happen to be a couple which disgusts me.  
>"You want to do physical exercise. This is impossible. I think I've been transported to another dimension," the nub joked.<br>"Shut it, Fredlumps!"  
>Carly interrupts before an argument starts, "I rather go work on my tan."<br>Frednerd says, "I would stay with Carly, but most guy don't tan with their girlfriends. Come on, Princess Puckett." That hurts,but it's expected.  
>"We'll be back, Carls!" I says taking off in a run. Freddie runs after me.<br>"Don't disappear for 12 hours!" she yells at us.  
>"No Promises!" Freddie and I scream in unison. We both slow down and begin walking along the shore.<p>

"Wanna play a game?" I ask.  
>"Sure. How about 'would you rather'?"<br>"You first."  
>"Would you rather be buried alive or fall to you death from an airplane?"<br>"Oh. Fall to my death."  
>"Why?" he questions me.<br>"The fall will be fun and the death will be instant. Would you rather kiss Miss Briggs or be bitten by a a tarantula."  
>"A tarantula won't kill me. I'd take it over Briggs any day. Would you rather listen to the album Rumors by Fleetwood Mac or Saturday Night Fever soundtrack?"<br>"You know Rumors by Fleetwood Mac is one of my favorites," I respond. Freddie turns his head and his eyes widen.  
>"Is that Gibby?" I look where his eyes are and see the mermaid swinging his shirt around dancing on a beach volleyball court.<br>"Yeah. It's the potato. He's with Tasha, Shane, and Wendy. Let's go talk to them."

Freddie and I walk over there and greet them in unison, "Hey guys." We turn and glare at each other.  
>"Hey" they all so excited simultaneously.<br>"Where's Carly?" Gibby asks us.  
>"She's tanning," Freddie answers.<br>"Hey Shane. I see you are all healed. I am really sorry you hurt yourself. I know me and Carly were acting foolish, but you can't still be blaming us," I say to Shane. He shook his head at me.  
>"I realized that your behavior had nothing to do with my accident. I should have been more cautious."<p>

Wendy who was sitting with Tasha a few feet away called me over, "Sam, come her."  
>"Coming!" I ran over to them and plopped down on the towel.<br>"What's up with you and Freddie?" Tasha asked. She really cuts to the chase. Where's the small talk?  
>"What do you mean?"<br>"You know what she means," Wendy says.  
>"Are you and Freddie 'involved'?" I'm confused at first and then I get what she is implying.<br>"No! He's with Carly!" I whisper-shouted.  
>"Do you want to be?" asks Wendy.<br>"Of course not. I would never do that to Carly."  
>"And if Carly wasn't a factor?"wonders Tasha. I hesitate to answer.<br>"I would contemplate it. I'm not sure I feel comfortable risking our friendship on a relationship that might not last. Carly is a factor and we can't pretend she's not."  
>"But you like him!" shouts Wendy.<br>"And he likes you! Don't you see the way he stares at you?" Tasha also shouts.  
>"Quiet down. If he liked me, why is he with Carly?"<br>"He's a boy. Boys are stupid. They don't know what they want" Wendy replies.  
>"We'll talk about this later," Tasha says seeing the boys head over. "Let's strip down and get in the water."<p>

Freddie returned and said, "Come on! The water waiting." He runs off and I follow. Then I jump on his back and wrestled him in the water.

"I win!" I say. I get up slowly and see him gawking again. Teen boys are pervs. We're only fifteen they need to learn to keep their hormones in check. "I should tell Carly you were checking me out."  
>His face turned 100 different shades of red. I just notice Freddie's shirtless body. His chest and abs are something to gawk at. I won't give him the pleasure of calling me out on it. I look him in the eyes. He replies, "I-I w-wasn't checking y-you out."<br>I turn to everyone behind us. The were busy splashing and playing around in the water. I call out to them,"hey guys!" I wait for them all to look up at me before I continued. Shane started drooling over me again. I glared causing him to gulp. "Was Fredloser checking me out?"

The look at me as if I was stupid and reply in unison, "duh!" I smirked in victory.  
>"Glad to know we all agree." I turned to face Freddie. "I should go check my phone to see, if Carly texted me." I notice the look of concern on his face. "Don't worry. I won't tell her you were drooling over me. You should really wipe that off, by the way." I grin as he wiped his mouth. I turn to retrieve my phone. I see a message from Carly. I told everyone she was on her way. She wanted to make sure Freddie wasn't ogling other girls. I wonder what she would say if she knew.<p>

"Hey you guys!" Carly shouted running over. She was wearing her pink bikini top with white shorts. She gave me a hug and kissed Freddie's cheek. I rolled my eyes.

"'Sup Carls." She grabs my and and pulls me over to speak to me privately. I crossed my arms  
>"What happened?" She asks.<br>"What are you talking about?"  
>"Was Freddie talking to other girls?"<br>"He only talked to me, Tasha and Wendy."  
>"Was he checking them out?" I'm a little offended she didn't consider my body a threat.<br>"No, the nub did not gawk at those girls." I uncrossed my arms. She looked at me and her eyes went to my body.  
>"What happened to you?!"<br>"What?"  
>"When did you get abs and boobs and a butt?" She asked me.<br>"Isn't that normal female anatomy?" I joke.  
>"Not when those parts look like yours. I remember when you were flat chested. What happened?"<br>"Puberty," I answered her with a smile. It's creepy how all my friends are looking at my body.  
>"Was he checking you out?" I can't answer her honestly. I just avoid the question.<br>"Carly, you have nothing to worry about. This is the dork remember."  
>"The dork, as you call him, has biceps now."<br>"Who cares?"

"Hey, let's play a game of volleyball!" Shane shouted.  
>"That's too much physical activity for me. I rather nap," I responded. Wendy, Gibby, and Tasha joined him.<br>"I'm gonna lay down and finish tanning," Carly responds.

"I'll stay here and watch the stuff." He smirked in my direction and adds, "we can't trust Sam to do it." They all leave the two of us alone.  
>I lean over and punch him in the shoulder. He shoves me playfully and I fall over. He looks concerned at me. I, of course, use his concern and worry to my advantage. "I'm so sorry, Sam," he apologized. He extends his hand to help me. I grab it and I don't let go. I certainly don't use it to get up. I use my strength to pull him down with me. Before I know it, the two of us are wrestling in the sand. Somehow Freddie ends up on top of me. He is straddling my waist and looking in to my eyes. His travel lower and he once again begins gawking. He starts to lean in to me. Is he going to kiss me? He's still leaning. His face is coming closer and closer. I hear Carly's music blaring. His eyes widen telling me he hears them too. Now he remembers his girlfriend's presence. He rolls over and lays beside me.<br>"Guys, stop fighting,"she heard us rustling around. Carly is right there! Here eyes were closed so she saw nothing. She just assumed I was trying to break his arm. What is wrong with him? Thank God Carly is oblivious to her surroundings. I'm left thinking about Freddie's lips almost touching mine. Why did he do that? What the hell just happened?!

AN: What is going on here? Was Freddie making a move on Sam? Was it all in her imagination? Next chapter takes place a week later. Summer is coming to an end. Review if you want more. I know, you want more. The sequel is being mapped out now. Praise? Criticism? Reviews are my oxygen. I need them to live.


	10. Selfless

Don't go breaking my heart  
>I couldn't if I tried<br>Honey if I get restless  
>Baby you're not that kind<br>Don't go breaking my heart  
>You take the weight off me<br>Honey when you knock on my door  
>I gave you my key<br>Elton John and Kiki Dee - Don't Go Breaking My Heart

Freddie POV:

I'm an idiot. I have a girl friend. I almost ruined it. I tried to kiss her best friend. Her best friend is also my best friend. I have to remember who my girlfriend is. I need to stop lusting after Sam. She knows I tried to kiss her. I would have,if it wasn't for Wendy. I think Wendy saw something. She smirked in our direction multiple times throughout the night. The last time I saw Sam was a few days ago. We were celebrating Carly's birthday on an episode of iCarly. We had a bunch of kids perform like a talent show, It reminded us of the show's origins.

Sam is just a friend. Why did I want to kiss her? Friends don't kiss. There was this one time. The whole 'first kiss' situation screwed with my head. I haven't felt like this since before I met Carly. Sam drives me crazy. She literally drives me insane. She knows all those habits she does that irritate me. For example, talking with her mouthful and comping all over the place. She does these things just to irritate me. I find these habits so annoying, but I can't help being fascinated with her. She's unpredictable. She's the must cunning, clever, and devious person I know. She's also loyal and passionate and so beautiful. I have to talk to someone about this.

I cannot tell Carly about this. Who tells their girlfriend that they have feelings for their best friend? I can't tell Spencer. Spencer is the only male figure in my life. He's like a brother to me which I needed do to the absence of a father. He would never be able to keep it a secret. He might be biased and tell me to do what is best for Carly. All I have left are Shane and Gibby. I called the two of them and invited them to the Groovy Smoothie. I got dressed inmy green polo and jean shorts before I left my apartment. I arrived at the place and say them waiting for me at a table. "Hey guys," I greet them.

"'Sup," says Gibby.  
>"Hey," Shane responds.<br>"I have a problem," I state.  
>In unison they reply, "we know." I raise my eyebrow at them.<br>"What exactly is my problem then?"  
>"Sam, duh" the say in unison again.<br>"This time she didn't cause you physical or emotional pain," Gibby comments  
>"I'd say she did just the opposite," says Shane.<br>"What do you know about it?" I question.  
>"It's obvious," they speak simultaneously. And I thought Sam and I do that often.<br>"What is so obvious and how so?" I ask.  
>"You have feelings for her," Gibby states.<br>"You couldn't keep you eyes off her in that bikini," comments Shane.  
>"It's not my fault she's attractive. You are one to talk, Shane. You kept gawking at her."<br>Shane defends himself, "I don't have a girlfriend. I can gawk and pray Sam won't hit me for it."  
>"This brings us to another problem," says Gibby.<br>"You are correct, sir. The Carly problem," Shane speaks.  
>"What Carly problem?" I am confused as to how they know so much.<br>"You have Carly as a girlfriend, but you are in love with Sam," Gibby response.  
>My eyes widen. "Who said anything about love?"<br>"Carly's a nice sweet girl. You don't want sweet. You want fire and Sam's feisty energy. Your romance with her could be very passionate, but their would be consequences."  
>"I like Carly. This is just a crush on Sam," I interject.<br>"If you really like Carly, you wouldn't be thinking of Sam this way," responded Gibby.  
>"This is more than attraction, Freddie. You two connect on a level people search their whole lives to find. Carly is too one dimensional for you. Their is nothing past the kindness and intelligence and humor. You are intrigued by the child like essence and fun of being with Sam. You're lucky Carly is the only one too oblivious to notice," Shane rants.<br>"I think she's in denial. She's a smart girl. Even Spencer knows," Gibby says.  
>"Spencer knows?" I says with wide eyes.<br>"It's obvious," they repeat their earlier statement again in unison.  
>"What do you want, Freddie?" Gibby asks me.<br>"Sweet naive Carly or fun and clever Sam. Don't forget about consequences!" Shane states.  
>"What consequences."<br>"Carly is a sensitive girl. If you pick Sam, you could lose her friendship and the web show," Gibby answers.  
>"If I pick Carly..."<br>"You could be sacrificing you happiness."  
>"How do you guys know so much about love?"I question.<br>"I've been with Tasha for years. I've seen a lot of movies."  
>"Shane?"<br>"I'm older than you guys. I have more experience with women."  
>"I have to go," I tell them and I wave them goodbye.<p>

I wander into a near by park. The park gives me an opportunity to think about the situation. Carly or Sam. Sam or Carly. Carly is nice. We have nothing in common other than our web show. We work well together. It's peaceful and calm. It could be considered perfect. We've been together for a month and we never argue. We always agree with each other. That's good right? If I wanted to hear my own opinions, maybe I should just talk to a mirror. Sam an I always debate almost everything. Her mind functions so differently than mine. I see the world in different colors. She sees it all in black and white with shades of gray. The different point of view is so captivating to listen to. She's the most creative person I know. I hear a voice interrupt my thoughts.

"Hey dork." It's my beautiful blonde-headed demon. She was wearing a blue t-shirt with white polka dots. Her jean shorts were truly short.  
>"Hi Sam."<br>"I haven't seen you in a while," she states.  
>"Yeah... I've been busy."<br>"Doing what?" Sam questions.  
>"Just some tech stuff."<br>"I know that's a lie and I know you're avoiding me." She glares at me.  
>"I-I'm not a-avoiding you," I stutter. I am the worst liar. I can't even keep eye contact. Her eyes are piercing into my soul.<br>"You're an awful liar."  
>"I know," I admit to her.<br>"I just want to know why."  
>"You know why."<br>"I want to know why that happened." She tilts her head at me showing her curiosity.  
>"You were just so close and I haven't been thinking straight."<br>"Oh. That makes sense." She appears to be almost disappointed. Did she want me to have feelings for her.  
>"I'm sorry about that by the way."<br>"You put me in a very uncomfortable position."  
>"What do you mean?"<br>"I've been struggling with whether or not to tell Carly. I've decided against it. How do you tell your best friend that their boyfriend tried to kiss them?" Her discomfort was apparent as she shifted next to me.  
>"What do we do?"<br>"About what?" she asks.  
>"About... Us?"<br>"What is 'us'?"  
>"I don't know." I truly have no idea what we are. If you asked me a year ago I'd say she was my best friend. Now, she feels like more than that. We know each other better than anyone else. She is almost a part of me.<br>"Then what do we do about something we don't understand."  
>"We let it be." I don't know what else to do. I might as well do nothing.<br>"You're wrong. This isn't about us."  
>"Then what do you think it is about?"<br>"You and me. There is no 'us'. There is only Carly and Freddie."  
>"I can't pretend there's not something between us."<br>"What do you feel about me?" Sam crossed her arms looking me in the eye.  
>"You make me laugh and smile like no other. You drive me insane. I know I like you."<br>"Liking each other isn't worth losing Carly. There is too much to lose . We should just ignore our feelings. I gotta go."

She leaves me standing here. I admire the trees and the bright blue sky. Another rejection. Wait. She feels the same way. She said 'liking each other.' That means she has to like me. We can't be together because of Carly. If Carly was a real friend, she would be happy for us. I know she is too emotional to understand. All she will see is betrayal. I think I want to be with Sam. I have to break up with Carly.

I get up and walk to Bushwell. I go and enter the unlocked door of Carly's apartment. "Hey," I call out to her.

"Hi Freddie," she says sitting on the couch.  
>"I have to tell you something."<br>"Me too. It's really important. I think you'll be very excited."  
>"You first."<br>"I-I think I l-love you."

I frown and blink a few times confused. I can't break up with her now. I won't lie to her and say it back. I kiss her cheek and say, "Ok. I'll see you around." I turn and leave her return. I go back to mine. I lay in my bed and I am absolutely confused. I don't think I feelings Carly. Carly doesn't even know what love is. This relationship feels so empty. I've never had a real relationship anyway. I wouldn't know what it is supposed to feel like. My last girlfriend, Valerie, used me. After we broke up, Val came to school with a broken nose. I believe this was courtesy of Sam. If I love anyone, then it's Sam. She cares for em the way I care for her. Who finds love in high school anyway? Is it just hormones or is it real? How did this happen? Why am I even in a love triangle? What is wrong with me? Three more weeks of summer to go. I can't wait for this drama to end.

AN: That is so like Freddie. He's doing his best to be selfless and so is Sam. They are both putting Carly's feelings above their own. As Sam said earlier when regarding boarding school, there is "too much to lose." Would you take a risk on love? Praise? Criticism? Review for more!


	11. Is it love?

Oh! I wanna dance with somebody  
>I wanna feel the heat with somebody<br>Yeah! I wanna dance with somebody  
>With somebody who loves me<br>Whitney Houston - I Wanna Dance with Somebody (Who

Loves Me)

Sam POV:  
>Who gets a summer cold? They're not only annoying, but inconvenient. I should be out partying and playing at the beach. I haven't seen Carly or Freddie because neither of them want to get sick. Lucky them for being healthy. Freddie wanted to come but his mother wouldn't allow him too. We communicated via text and phone calls. Who really calls anyone nowadays? We do. I like to her the sound of his voice.<br>There it is again. Those feelings show up when I think of him. I wish the words I spoke were true. It would be easier to hate him. I don't. I hate things about him. I hate how he rambles about technology. I secretly happen to know almost as much as he does. That's essentially why I find it to be such a bore. He talks about the nerdiest thing like Galaxy Wars. How cliche is that? I nerd that is obsessed with Sci-Fi. That's predictable. He's too honest and too kind and too sweet. He follows rules and respects his crazy mother. How can I not hate such a goody two shoes?  
>My thoughts are interrupted by the doorbell ringing. I wonder if my mom forgot her keys again. I open the door and see the nub. Speak of the devil. It's kinda ironic considering he calls me a blonde-headed demon. I didn't know demons could have different colored hair. I slam the door without locking it. He for some reason takes this as an invitation to come in. I turn and speak to him. "Leave!"<br>"No, I'm worried about you."  
>"I don't want your mother over here trying to sanitize the both of us."<br>"Is your cold better?"  
>"Yeah but I'm still recovering." Look out side and see it's raining. "I'm bored."<br>"What do you want me to do about it?" He asked me.  
>"Entertain me." Isn't it obvious?<br>"How?" How am I supposed to know? He's supposed to be entertaining me.  
>"I don't know. Do a song and dance. Tell me a story."<br>"Once upon a time there was a girl named Princess Puckett. She was born to a family of witches, but was adopted by royals. Her best friend was her adopted sister, Princess Shay. A servant boy longed to be with Princess Shay for years. He knew his feelings for her were not real though. He struggled with his the adopted Princess. He tried to deny them and push them away, but at the end of the day the feelings were still there. She could be cruel but he cared deeply for her. She made him happy. One day, Princess Shay gives the servant boy a chance. The servant boy is no longer a servant by then. After taking years of training and abuse by Princess Puckett, the boy has become a knight. He is stronger than he was before. His relationship with Princess Shay was not as he hoped it was empty. Princess Puckett had developed feelings for him along the way and locked herself in a tower. She refused to let him in. They were so close. The adopted Princess and the new knight were so different but similar to the core. They were complete opposites at times yet they both were stubborn and loyal. The knight wanted to leave Princess Shay but he knew he would face consequences. Princess Shay claims to love him. He knows it's not true. She is in love with the idea of love. He still does not want to hurt her. He longs for the Princess in the tower. He will wait forever for her to come down and talk about her feelings for him. They both know they feel the same way. She is took afraid of change and risk in love. Until Princess Puckett comes down from the tower, the knight will continue to suffer in a loveless relationship with Princess Shay. Don't worry, the knight will wait for his Princess. She is the girl that owns his heart."  
>I am stunned and I don't know what to say. I don't want to have this discussion. I wish I was more sick. I could have used that as an excuse to get him out of here. "That was boring," I state hoping this will motivate him to leave.<br>"Sam-"  
>"Not now Freddie. Please." I plead with him. I'm not ready for this. I can't handle this. I don't even know what this is.<br>"It's getting harder to ignore, Sam." I don't need him to tell me what he is talking about. He's speaking of his feelings.  
>"Maybe we need some time apart."<br>"It would hurt too much to be away from you," he responds.  
>"You sound like some romance movie. You spend too much time with Carly."<br>"You're right. I'd rather be spending that time with you." Stuff like that gets me. How can I reject him when he is so sweet?  
>"I'm bored again." I look out the window and watch the rain pour. "I'm going outside!" I grab my rain jacket and put it on.<br>"Sam! Wait!" I'm already out the door. I'm wearing converse not rain boots. My jeans are getting wet as I splash around. I begin to spin. My face is wet and I feel free. My hair is soaking with water and dripping down my back. I decide to sing.  
>"I'm singing in the rain<br>Just singing in the rain  
>What a glorious feeling<br>I'm happy again  
>I walk down the lane<br>With a happy refrain  
>I'm singing, singing in the rain"<br>I turn and see Freddie still standing in the door way laughing. "I need music!"  
>"What am I supposed to do?"<br>"Sing me a song."  
>"I'm not much of a singer," he whispers. I can barely hear him in the rain.<br>"You didn't have that problem at karaoke." I commented.  
>"That was different."<br>"How so?!"  
>"I was singing with you." There he goes again. I swear his words are going to kill me. He does the cutest things sometimes like the way he wrinkles his nose or smirks at me. I wish I could punch him in the face and declare my hate for him. I can't. I care for him too deeply.<br>"Grab my moms vintage boom box and put it in the door way. Turn it all the way up and push play." He follows my instructions. I stand there in the lightly pouring rain with my eyes closed. I just breathe in the air. I hear music surround me.  
><em><br>A few stolen moments is all that we share _  
><em>You've got your family, and they need you there <em>  
><em>Though I've tried to resist, being last on your list <em>  
><em>But no other man's gonna do<em>  
><em>So I'm saving all my love for you<em>

I open my eyes. I see Freddie watching me. I want to dance again. I don't want to dance alone. I want to dance with me. "Come here!"

_It's not very easy, living all alone _  
><em>My friends try and tell me, find a man of my own <em>  
><em>But each time I try, I just break down and cry <em>  
><em>Cause I'd rather be home feeling blue <em>  
><em>So I'm saving all my love for you <em>

"Why?"  
>"Dance with me." I shoot him a smile I know he can't resist. He walks over to me. He's wearing his jacket. He puts hands on my waist. We look into each other's eyes. My arms wrap around his neck. He decides too be bold and pull me closer.<p>

_You used to tell me we'd run away together _  
><em>Love gives you the right to be free <em>  
><em>You said be patient, just wait a little longer <em>  
><em>But that's just an old fantasy <em>  
><em>I've got to get ready, just a few minutes more <em>  
><em>Gonna get that old feeling when you walk through that door <em>  
><em>For tonight is the night, for feeling alright <em>  
><em>We'll be making love the whole night through <em>  
><em>So I'm saving all my love <em>  
><em>Yes I'm saving all my love <em>  
><em>Yes I'm saving all my love for you <em>

I'm slow dancing in the rain with Fredward Benson. The nub. The dork. The geek. I can't deny it anymore. I've had crushes before. I liked Jonah and Shane and Pete. It wasn't like this. It was easier with them. This is harder but so much stronger. I know what this is. I know what the feeling between us is. It's love. I love him. I love Freddie. I can no longer look into his intense gaze. I rest my head on his shoulder. I refuse to pull away. I find comfort in his embrace.

_No other woman, is gonna love you more _  
><em>Cause tonight is the night, that I'm feeling alright<em>  
><em>We'll be making love the whole night through <em>  
><em>So I'm saving all my love <em>  
><em>Yeah I'm saving all my love <em>  
><em>Yes I'm saving all my love for you <em>  
><em>For you, for you<em>

We pull apart. Silence fills the air. I know he wants to kiss me. I want him to. I know he can't. He's taken. I was too late. Maybe I could tell Carly. She wouldn't understand. No one is there to witness moments like this. "I have to go," He says as he turns to enter his mothers minivan.  
>"Are you going to Wendy's party?"<br>"Yeah. I am."  
>"I'll see you there."<br>He drives away. I'm left standing in the rain alone. Love is killing me slowly. I don't know what to do. I'm gonna tell him that I love him. I have to. It's the only way. I can't deal with this feeling anyway. I need to end this. We either get together or we don't. I need this to all be over. I'll tell him how I feel at Wendy's party. God, I hope I don't get sick again.


	12. Party part 1

Now I gotta cut loose, footloose  
>Kick off the Sunday shoes<br>Please, Louise, pull me off of my knees  
>Jack, get Mack, come on before we crack<br>Lose your blues, everybody cut footloose  
>Kenny Loggins - Footloose<p>

Freddie POV:  
>Love. This is it. I love her. I love Sam. Platonic friends don't slow dance in the rain for no reason. Theirs obviously romantic feelings there. Maybe she doesn't feel the same way. I know she likes me. Is that it? Is it just a crush for her? Will she get over me the second better looking guy comes along? I think she could love me. If she wanted a better looking guy, it would be easy for her. Seeing the way Shane gawked at her in that bikini proves that all she would have to do is stay on the beach to find a new man. She doesn't want them. Does she want me? I want to be with her. She is too loyal to Carly for her own good. Maybe it's the risk that scared her.<p>

I never thought I would ever be talking about Sam having fear. She is so brave. I thought she was fearless. I guess to be brave you have to conquer fear. Everyone in her life has abandoned her. Fist it was her father. She doesn't believe she is good enough for love. She's more than enough for me. Her mother left mentally. The woman that replaced her is a monster. Sam suffers through the emotional abuse and is still so strong. All her mother does is insult her and compare her to Melanie. I'm pretty sure Mel exists now. Her kiss didn't have the same spark as Sam's. That might have been because it was my first kiss though. I can't wait to kiss her again (Sam not Melanie). Sam is her own person yet her own mother doesn't understand that. According to Sam, she was caring once. Now she is just an alcoholic. Melanie left her to fend for herself. Melanie was too good for her old life. She didn't even hesitate when the chance to leave came. have to let Sam know she is loved. I love her. I love Sam. She will know at the party tonight.

I arrive with Carly in hand. I wonder if she knows how I feel. She has to know. It's obvious according to everyone else. I'm not in love with her. I love Carly. Carly is like a sister. When she kisses me, it feels like incest. It takes everything in me not to take my hand and wipe my mouth. Her lips are a reminded I'm not with Sam. Carly doesn't even love me. I tried to talk to her about saying that she loved me. She said it was a mistake. She shouldn't have rushed into saying it. She doesn't want to pressure me into saying it back. She is confused as to why I can't. I used to declare my love to her all the time. It would be a lie now. It was a lie then. I have come to realize my feeling for her were never real. I wanted her because she was the ideal girl for almost every guy. I wanted to be normal and have feelings for her. Having feelings for Sam made no sense to onlookers and I wouldn't want to be seen as weird. I didn't want to wreck things if she felt differently. I was afraid of those strong feelings. I lied to myself about how I felt about Carly. I kept lying and I began to believe the lie. It was always Sam and it alway will be. She is the keeper of my heart.  
>I search through the crowd to look for her. Carly keeps talking. I'm not really listening. I never realized how much she talks before. Everything she says is about her. I just nods my head occasionally and agree with her as always. This has to end.<br>"Carly?"  
>"Yes Freddiebear." Here she goes with the pet names. This is worse than when my mom calls me that.<br>"Do you love me?"  
>"Yes, I do. You know that."<br>"How does love feel?"  
>"I like being with you and hanging out. You are so sweet and polite. You're such a perfect gentleman. You're really smart and a good listener." Actually I never pay attention. You don't have anything important to say.<br>"You just told me what you like about me. You didn't tell me how you feel."  
>"I smile when I'm with you."<br>"You smile when you're with anyone."  
>"What are you saying?"<br>"You don't love me."  
>"I love you," Carly insists. We're in high school real love is almost impossible. What I feel for Sam is the exception.<br>"No you don't."  
>"You can't tell me how I feel."<br>"Do you know how I feel?"  
>"Yes, you love me. You just haven't been saying it recently. Why is that?" I must have been really pathetic to declare my love to her regularly. I really should have listened to Sam and moved on sooner.<br>"I can't lie to you."  
>"About what?" she questions. This is gonna hurt (for her that is).<br>"I can't lie about how I feel. I don't love you."  
>"Who is the skank?"<br>"What skank?"  
>"The skank you are cheating on me with."<br>"I'm not cheating on you."  
>"Then why don't you love me. I'm a good girlfriend." This is all my fault I shouldn't have asked her out in the first place. I knew she was desperate for affection.<br>"You are a good girlfriend, but you are not the girlfriend for me."  
>"Who is?"<br>"Why do you ask?"  
>"You must have an idea of who the right girlfriend is for you."<br>"I have an idea."  
>"Tell me. You've been having an emotion affair with some random girl. I'll have Sam claw her face off." I doubt Sam would give it to herself.<br>"Carly, I think it's best if we break up."  
>"Of course you do. You have some skank waiting for you to break up with me."<br>"I'm going to find out who she is and give her a piece of my mind."  
>She storms off angry. I can't blame her. She was just dumped at a party. I can't help but feel like a douche. I was in a suffocating relationship. It was bound to end sooner or later. I chose to end it now. It had to be over before I declared my love to Sam.<p>

I walk around looking for the girl I love. I need to loosen up. I hear a voice from the other room. "Did you see Puckett? She looks so hot." That is Sam's old douche bag boyfriend, Jonah.  
>"I know what you mean. Her skirt isn't short enough for my liking." I can't recognize the other voice he's talking to.<br>"Think I could get her into bed?" What? He's such a perv. He tried to cheat on Sam and now he wants to sleep with her.  
>"She's a tough chick. I don't think she'd let you breathe on her, especially after what you did."<br>"I just tried to kiss her best friend. Sam used to be all over me. Why wouldn't she want me?"  
>"She's no slut. She's interested in that Benson kid anyway." This is a wise stranger.<br>"Benson? The tech geek? The guy used to be friends with." I very much regret that friendship.  
>"Yeah him."<br>"He's not man enough for her. I can take him easy. No more him and I can get into her pants easy." Ouch that hurt. He cares what that ass hole says. Sure he has more experience with the ladies, his opinion doesn't matter. Sam doesn't think I'm not manly. Then again, she tells me to toughen up all the time. She's been telling me that since the day we met. What if he's right?  
>"You're such a dick."<br>"Like you wouldn't tap that."  
>"Of course I would. She's got a nice ass. She's also got a nice left hook. I like my face the way it is." This guy gets smarter and smarter.<br>"Whatever bro. Tell me that when I'm bangin' her." I hear Jonah march away.

"Yo Fred," that husky voice belongs to Brick some guy from the football team I used to tutor.  
>"Hey," I sigh clearly upset.<br>"Cheer up man. Have a cup." I know it's beer. I've only had it once before at a party during last year's spring break. I didn't get drunk. Being hungover doesn't sound too appealing. I had s couple red solo cups throughout the night. It was enough for me to chill and not be so stressed. You know me. I worry a lot. Tonight is a big night. I hope and pray nothing goes wrong.  
>"No thanks," I respond politely. What am I doing using manners at a high school party? Hey, I was raised a gentleman. It makes me appeal to women (sometimes). Shannon, my psycho fan girl stalker, agrees.<br>"Stop being so depressed, Freddie!"  
>"Yeah! Freddie! Freddie! Freddie!" A group of people in the area chant for me.<p>

I take a drink from a cup. The group cheers and moves on uninterested. I'm about to have an anxiety attack. I'm man enough for Sam, right? What if she hates me? I could have just ruined her friendship with Carly. Carly hates me. She also hates my "skank" on the side. That" skank" happens to be her best friend. Sam is no skank. Beer is a new taste I'm adapting too. It still taste gross but it calms my nerves. I have to relax. The alcohol seems to be working.

Sam likes me. She said so. Who cares if she doesn't love me now? I can make her fall in love with me. Carly is another problem. They are best friends and I shouldn't have fallen for both. Then again, I didn't. I fell for Sam, but hid behind the illusion of what a perfect girl is supposed to be (Carly). What if Carly makes Sam chose between us? Love can really divide friends. I thought the whole being abandoned as a third wheel would be my only issue when dating Carly. I never expected a love triangle.

After downing that drink, I grab another. I take another sip. Does Sam like me more than Carly? I think she could. We know each other better than anyone else. If Carly was a good friend, she would understand. This beer isn't too bad. Who cares about how Sam feels? I love the girl, but there are others. I can show her what she's missing. Shannon could help me make her jealous. That's a bad idea. What am i thinking? Angry Sam means Violent Sam. Violent Sam is dangerous. I personally love all the sides of Sam. Her aggression is sexy.

I continue to sip my drink. I've become immune to the flavor. Maybe I just need a bit of liquid courage. Sam's a smart girl. She wouldn't waste her time on some jerk who would treat her like trash. She's my princess. I do call her Princess Puckett. I can be her prince. I'm an intelligent kind loving guy. She doesn't need anyone else. I think I'm almost relaxed enough to find Sam. She wouldn't reject me. I'm her dork. She wouldn't devote so much time to me if she didn't have feelings for me. I just have to go make her my lady. Half an hour passes and I've consumed several drinks. I wander towards the dance floor and see Sam talking with Pete. He's her ex boyfriend. Why is she with him? They're just talking. It's completely innocent. She used to have a huge crush on him. She changed herself for him. If she like her the way she is now, she might go back to him. I need another drink or two.

AN: I'm well aware Freddie is almost OOC. He's nervous from the possibility of facing rejection from the girl he loves. He's at a party where everyone is drinking. He sees alcohol as a solution. Next chapter is part two of the party from Sam. Why is she talking to Pete? What happens with Carly? Does Jonah make a move on Sam? What goes on in that missing half hour? Review!


	13. Party part 2

I come home in the morning light  
>My mother says when you gonna live your life right<br>Oh mother dear we're not the fortunate ones  
>And girls they want to have fun<br>Oh girls just want to have fun  
>Cyndi Lauper - Girls Just Want To Hace Fun<p>

Sam POV:  
>Oh Wendy! That girl sure knows how to party. It sure does help that her parents are rich. Her fancy mansion looks like a castle next to my home in the trailer park. The music is loud and face. People are dancing. They're dancing mostly resemble having sex with clothes on. I've danced with Freddie twice and neither of those times were <em>that<em> naughty. I just got here and I'm thinking of him. Freddie. If anyone makes my blood boil and my head spin out of control, its him. He's my love and I've been contemplating confessing it to him.

I know I mentally planned to at the party. There are so many reasons not to. This isn't something you blurt out in the presence of 100 teenagers. It doesn't help the situation that he has a girlfriend. His girlfriend is my best friend and has been for so long. Even when she moved to Texas. We were close. We sent each other emails quite frequently in regards to our lives. I love her like a sister. I'm not sure if I can hurt her by feeling this way.

I'm left thinking what would happen if I was forced to choose. Carly or Freddie. Freddie or Carly. It wasn't too long ago that was puking up blood at the thought of Carly and Freddie being together. I still want to, I just don't. I vomited for a week after finding out about Melanie and Freddie kissing on their date. Now it might be just Carly and myself in a completely platonic relationship. It may end up being me and Freddie together romantically. The love of a sister vs the love of Freddie. He doesn't really have a title. He's not my boyfriend. Our relationship clearly is not official, but I can sense he wants it to be. Then again why is he with Carly?

She the prefect girl. Carly is nice and sweet and pretty. I'm not ugly and completely unattractive. I know I must be decent looking for Shane to be gawking at me the way he did on the beach. Shane is without a doubt a hot guy, so I value his opinion. I am not necessarily insecure. I don't care what people think of me. I'm just observant to my place in society. I don't care how I'm ranked. I financially don't measure up to Wendy. I'm not as smart or attractive as Carly. I'm just a comical meat loving girl who used to be a bully. It's been a year since I've given a nerd (not Freddie or Gibby) a wedgie. I don't consider Gibby or Freddie to be victims. They practically ask for it.

I make my way to the food. I know they won't have any ham or bacon or fat cakes so i'm not disappointed when I see chips and pizza. I like all food with the exception of vegetarian a healthy chiz. I see Carly. I can't avoid her. She looks like she has been crying. "Hey, Carls. What's wrong?"  
>"Freddie dumped me." She sighed while clearly trying to hold back tears.<br>"What? Why?" I hope this isn't my fault.  
>"He's cheating on me with some skank." Freddie? A cheater? You must be mistaken.<br>"He confessed to cheating?"  
>"No. He didn't deny it was some other girl, though." Oh geez. It is my fault, I think. That stupid nub.<br>"So he didn't cheat. He didn't want to lie to you." Her eyes start to burn with anger.  
>"These past four years of friendship with Freddie were a lie! He's told me years that he loved me. Guess what?! He lied. He told me he never loved me, after I told him I loved him. He just lured me in to break my heart!" I'd really hate Freddie for hurting her, if I wasn't in love with him. Any other guy would get my butter sock.<br>"Carly, you know the dork isn't a jerk. Maybe he didn't mean to lie. He could have fallen out of love with you and in love with someone else, accidentally." I truly don't believe in "falling out of love." You either always will love that person or you never did. People just mistaking "loving" someone to with being "in love."  
>"I know. I just hate him and that skank. I'm gonna tear her to shreds, when I find her." Carly doesn't really scare me, but that look in her eye is vicious. I feel sorry for that skunk bag. Oh right! I almost forgot that was me.<br>"Maybe it was unintentional and the 'skank' didn't know he was falling for her."  
>"I don't care. Freddie chose her over me. I've spent my life trying to be perfect! A lot of boys want me! I chose Freddie and look what he did! I can't wait to get my hands on her." She runs off looking for Freddie with his secret girl on the side. She won't find her considering she just left me.<p>

I turn to leave but bump in to someone. It's my ex-boyfriend, Jonah. He tried to kiss Carly, while we were dating. Carly was right. All the boys do seem to want her, except Freddie. It's almost funny. I'm tempted to punch the smirk off Jonah's face."Yo Puckett. You're lookin' fine." I knew this skirt was too short. Why didn't I wear leggings? I should have worn jeans or shorts.  
>"Get away asshole," I growl at him.<br>"Baby, there's no need to get so feisty." I see his eyes roam my body. That pig. Who does he think he is calling me baby?  
>"You know I can kick your ass."<br>"You know I can grab yours." No pervs are allowed within a 50ft radius of me. I close my first and prepare to swing.  
>"Leave the lady alone." I see my ex Pete standing beside me. Is there anyone here that I haven't dated. "She's with me." No, I'm not. He winks at me and I realize what I he's doing.<br>I nod at Pete. "Go away, Jonah."  
>The creep laughs at us. "I'll get you, Sam. Maybe not now. Sooner or later, you'll be mine." He stomps away in a manner very similar to Carly had previously.<p>

I turn to Pete and notice how his blonde hair shines like a halo around his head. "You know I can handle myself." What is with guys trying to save me?  
>"I'm just trying to keep you out of juvie. You would have put him in a coma."<br>"That's a major possibility. Thanks." We both laugh. He shoots his dazzling smile at me. If I didn't love Freddie and I was a daffodil like Carly, I would faint. "Why did you say I was with you?"  
>He blushes and looks down almost shyly. "I just didn't want to use physical force."<br>I grin at him. "How can I repay you for your kindness."  
>"Dance with me. It's not a slow song. You don't have to be uncomfortable. It's just in case Jonah comes back." I don't believe his reasoning for wanting to dance, but I nod towards to dance floor. He follows me and we dance with distance between. I don't get close. I don't want to lead him on. I'm not interested, but Pete is a lot of fun.<p>

"Can I cut in?" I turn to see Freddie, my love. Wow that sounds weird. A former bully is in love.  
>Pete looks at him in confusion. He nods slightly. I can see the disappointment in his eyes. "I'm heading outside for fresh air," Pete tells us.<br>Freddie then grabs my arm and drags me towards a bedroom. He probably wants to talk privately. Normally violence would follow some guy pulls me into a room. Freddie isn't just some guy. "I wanted to talk to you," he states. Is that alcohol I smell on his breath?  
>"I heard you broke up with Carly at the party. She feels you humiliated her." I moved to sit on the bed.<br>"I know I hurt her. I didn't mean to. I just couldn't take it. I should have done it along time ago especially when I knew I had feelings for someone else."  
>"We can't be together at the moment."<br>"Why not?!" He's practically shouting. Please don't tell me he's an angry drunk. Why was he drinking?  
>"Carly is hurting. I'd rather not cause her anymore pain."<br>"We've waited long enough! I want you and only you!" He stumbles on his way to sit next to me on the bed.  
>"Why can't you be patient?"<br>His voice lowers as he looks in to my eyes, "you're so beautiful." He pushes a strand of my hair behind my ear. "I love you," he whispers to me.  
>I'm shocked. He cups my cheeks with his hands. His lips crash into mine. I can taste the alcohol and he tastes delicious. My whole body is on fire and it's a heavenly sensation. The door suddenly slams open.<p>

"Freddie!" We separate and see Carly standing there with her arms crossed. "Sam?!"  
>"This isn't what it looks like," I try to tell her. I know she's going to assume the worst.<br>"So you weren't kissing my boyfriend?!"  
>"He's not your boyfriend." I look to Freddie for help, but I see looking as if he's about to pass out.<br>"I know you would seduce him. You spent 12 hours alone with him. You must have been sleeping together since then!" She's drawing a crowd.  
>"We're not sleeping together!" I try to set her straight but Carly can be stubborn when she wants to.<br>"Then why were you two kissing on a bed!" The crowd gasps. I turn and the nub is laying down looking sick. He needs to learn how to hold his alcohol better.  
>"You won't fuck me, but you'll screw Benson." Why is Jonah talking? I don't need this.<br>"I'm not screwing anyone!"  
>"That's not what this looks like," he responds. Pete should have let me break all the bones in his body. "You're a slut. You're with Pete, but messing around with a nerd." The crowds jaw drops in response to the false statement about my relationship with Pete. He went for a walk so he can't defend me. This sucks.<br>"You're such a bitch. For years you have tortured kids for no reason. You have cooled off recently, but all along you changed your target. You stopped focusing on nerds and dorks. You wanted to hurt ME! I thought we were best friends. I was WRONG! You're just like your mother. You're lazy and you're not very smart. Your grades are evidence. It won't be long till your drunk on a street corner and fucking any man who will pay to survive. If you didn't know, this friendship is OVER!" Carly snaps at me. She then turns and slaps me in the face. You can just see the worry of the members of the crowd. They know I'm aggressive. They've seen the damage I can do. Freddie starts to vomit on the other side of the bed. Poor Wendy!  
>Carly begins to worry. I can see the panic in her face. She is no stranger to seeing me get violent. "I'm not gonna hurt you Shay, but I am done with you." I storm off and hear a bunch of voices surrounding me. I hear my name mentioned along with the words "bitch," "slut," and "whore." I can't deal with this. I gotta get out of here. By here I don't mean just this house. I'm getting out of Seattle. In the morning, I'm telling my mom to schedule the audition for boarding school.<p>

AN: Well that was crazy intense! Drama all over the place. Sam is leaving or is she? Suggestions for Sam's audition song? It can be from any year. I have one in mind. Review for the next two chapters! Sequel in the works! Praise? Criticism? Review!


	14. Party Aftermath

I don't give a damn 'bout my reputation  
>You're living in the past, it's a new generation<br>A girl can do what she wants to do and that's what I'm gonna do  
>An' I don't give a damn 'bout my bad reputation<br>Oh no, not me  
>Joan Jett - Bad Reputation<p>

Freddie POV:  
>It's been a week since the party at Wendy's. My relationship with Carly is over. Sam and I aren't talking. I called her once and she said Carly hurt her and she didn't want to give anyone else a chance to do the same. What happened at the party is all over Splashface. Sam is taunted on the internet and called promiscuous. This could ruin iCarly. The show has been cancelled temporarily.<p>

I personally have no recollection of that night. I didn't even drink that much. Someone did film a portion of it and posted it. All you can hear is Carly calling Sam names and Jonah talking about Sam refusing to sleep with him but being with Pete and myself. What the hell happened? Carly claims Sam and I were on a bed about to have sex. We aren't ready for that. Sam is no hoe. All I can remember is vomiting anywhere.

Today I'm going to speak with Carly. She's been avoiding me. I live across the hall, but I never see her. She never answers her phone or replies to my texts. She's never home anymore according to Spencer. It's about 9:00 am. I woke up early to catch her before she can escape. I knock on the door and a voice responds. "Who is it?" It's Spencer.  
>"Freddie."<br>"Doors unlocked." I open the door and greet him.  
>"Hey. Is Carly here?"<br>"Yeah. She was about to go shopping. CARLY!" He calls for her and she answers.  
>"WHAT?!"<br>"COME DOWN STAIRS!"  
>"COMING!" She charges down the stairs wearing a red top and black skirt. She sees me and says, "oh, it's you." Her voice is monotone.<br>"We need to talk." It sounds like we're breaking up. We already did that.  
>"No we don't."<br>"I'm worried about Sam." She laughs as if its the funnies thing she's ever heard.  
>"Why would I care about your mistress?" I am super confused.<br>"What are you talking about?"  
>"I know about you affair with Sam. I know you only broke up with me because I wouldn't put out." I stare at blankly. Carly really doesn't know anything.<br>"Sam and I never had an affair."  
>"Really? Explain to me why the night our relationship ended, you had your tongue down her throat."<br>"All because we kissed doesn't mean we were having an affair," I state.  
>"Are you telling me it was meaningless like your first kiss with her? I don't believe that."<br>"You're right it does mean something."  
>"Yeah. It means Sam is easy and has violated girl code."<br>"Sam is not easy. I kissed Sam because I love her." You should have seen the look on her face. Carly is pissed!  
>"You LOVE her! You were MY boyfriend!"<br>"We don't click romantically. Our relationship is more platonic."  
>"I loved you."<br>"Maybe as a brother but not as a lover."  
>"You're WRONG."<br>"Do you still think about Griffen?" I ask.  
>"Yes but-"<br>"Do you think about being with other people?" I interrupted her answer.  
>"Sometimes but-"<br>"Do you check your phone regularly to see if I called?" I cut her off again.  
>She hesitates before answering, "no."<br>"Do you day-dream about me?"  
>"No."<br>"Does your heart beat faster when I'm near or blush when I speak to you?"  
>"No."<br>"Do you love me?"  
>"I don't think so anymore."She pauses and then continues, "You don't love me. I don't love you. You love Sam." Her voice is soft and almost like a whisper. "How did this happen?"<br>"She's crazy. She's drives me nuts. Sam pumps my adrenaline. She makes me smile and laugh like no other. Her opinions and thoughts fascinate me."  
>"You two always fight."<br>"We never fight. We bicker and disagree. We like debating. It's never fighting. We never mean the cruel things we say. I understand her and she gets me."  
>Carly shakes her head. "I'm not sure how I feel about this. You being with her could end up in flames similar to almost anything Spencer touches." She giggles softly. "The sad truth is Sam has no plans after high school. She might end up no where. You might have to leave her behind when you go off to college."<br>"I would NEVER leave her. I'm NOT her father."  
>"If she loves you, she'd want you to leave. Your dreams would be more important to her. This won't end well."<br>"I'm sorry you were hurt, Carly. I have more faith in my love for Sam than anything." I turn to leave her apartment. Sam may be trying to dodge me. I'll wait to see her where she can't avoid me: school.

Sam POV:

The audition is taking place at Ridgeway High School. I walk onto the stage of the auditorium. Mel's boarding school sent four representatives to watch me. One has a camera and is filming. I'm wearing a black dress with an A-line silhouette with a breezy skirt. It also has a delicately ruched bodice as well as an illusion sweetheart neckline and sheer, lightweight mesh swathes. My hair is to the side in a ponytail.  
>"State your full name and song choice," An unidentified voice commanded.<br>"My name is Samantha Puckett and I will be performing Roots Before Branches by Room For Two," I answer. The music starts and I begin to sing.

_"So many things_  
><em>To do and say<em>  
><em>But I can't seem<em>  
><em>To find my way<em>  
><em>But I wanna know how<em>  
><em>I know<em>  
><em>I'm meant<em>  
><em>For something else<em>  
><em>But first<em>  
><em>I gotta find myself<em>  
><em>But I don't know how"<em>

I have to be on my own. Who am I without Carly and Freddie? I can forgive Carly for her assumptions she was brokenhearted. With Freddie I begin to wonder if love is even real. All my feelings for Freddie have brought me was pain and complications.

_"Oh, why do  
><em>_I reach for the stars  
><em>_When I don't have wings  
><em>_To carry me that far?"_

I'm not ready for love. Neither is Freddie or Carly. Carly doesn't know what love is but she was willing to declare her "love" for aren't ready for these feelings. As teenagers we don't know how to handle such emotions. Sometimes I wanna strangle Freddie, but other times I just want him to hold me close like that day dancing in the rain.

_"I gotta have_  
><em>Roots before branches<em>  
><em>To know who I am<em>  
><em>Before I know<em>  
><em>Who I wanna be<em>  
><em>And faith<em>  
><em>To take chances<em>  
><em>To live like I see<em>  
><em>A place in this world<em>  
><em>For me"<em>

All my life I've seen men cause hurt in pain. My father broke my family and in a way, he broke me. I'm not the same carefree girl I once was. I have the same spontaneous nature and will power as well as creativity. I'm not as strong as I used to be emotionally, not physically (Freddork can attest to that).

_"Sometimes_  
><em>I don't wanna feel<em>  
><em>And forget the pain<em>  
><em>Is real<em>  
><em>Put my head<em>  
><em>In the clouds<em>  
><em>Oh, start to run<em>  
><em>And then I fall<em>  
><em>Seein'<em>  
><em>I can't get it all<em>  
><em>Without my feet<em>  
><em>On the ground"<em>

I'm not an honest person. I'm a liar and I even taught Spencer how to lie successfully. It's a lie every time someone calls me fearless. I do have a fear. I fear rejection and getting hurt. I've seen what it did to my mom. Her body belongs to the worthless men who neglect her and use her sexually. She turns to alcohol for relief. I don't want to be that.

_"There's always a seed_  
><em>Before there's a rose<em>  
><em>The more that it rains<em>  
><em>The more I will grow"<em>

I have to grow and be mature before I can have a serious relationship. I'm a tough girl who is street smart. Most people only view me as an aggressive girl who like to eat unhealthy all the time with crazy awesome metabolism. I am more than that. I hope I am more than that. Maybe I'm not. I will grow to be more. I have to learn right from wrong without having Carly or Freddie as a compass.

_"I gotta have_  
><em>Roots before branches<em>  
><em>To know who I am<em>  
><em>Before I know<em>  
><em>Who I wanna be<em>  
><em>And faith<em>  
><em>To take chances<em>  
><em>To live like I see<em>  
><em>A place in this world<em>  
><em>For me"<em>

Sometimes I'm afraid of myself and who I am. Violence is almost the definition of who I am. My mom's boyfriends get rough with her so often I don't know what is considered normal. Am I destined to be treated that way? Am I going to repeat the cycle? I'm not like perfect little Melanie. I can develop into someone willing to succeed. I have to figure out what it is I'm going to do for the rest of my life. No one ever taught me to be ambitions considering they saw me as a failure next to my sister.

_"Whatever comes_  
><em>I know how to take it<em>  
><em>Learn to be strong<em>  
><em>I won't have to fake it<em>  
><em>Oh, you're understandin'<em>  
><em>Oh, but when you come<em>  
><em>And do it best<em>  
><em>There ain't nothin'<em>  
><em>To stoppin' east to west<em>  
><em>But I'll still<em>  
><em>Be standing<em>  
><em>I'll be standing"<br>_

All my life I thought I was destined to fail. I believed the words of my teachers and my mother. My own mother believes I'll end up all alone. I might if I continue to not see clearly. I need to comprehend consequences. Who wants to be with someone with no goals? Who wants someone who doesn't have a future? I will have a future.

_"I gotta have_  
><em>Roots before branches<em>  
><em>To know who I am<em>  
><em>Before I know<em>  
><em>Who I wanna be<em>  
><em>And faith<em>  
><em>To take chances<em>  
><em>To live like I see<em>  
><em>A place in this world"<em>

Leaving for boarding school is a direct result of what has happened to my friendship with Carly and Freddie. Though it is an awful reasoning, it's the best choice. I can be free from the chains of Seattle. I don't have to end up in jail. This is an opportunity to better myself. I don't need to solve problems with my fist. This school will show me how. Then I can finally be on everyone else's level. i don't have to be less than.

_"I gotta have_  
><em>Roots before branches<em>  
><em>To know who I am<em>  
><em>Before I know<em>  
><em>Who I wanna be<em>  
><em>And faith<em>  
><em>To take chances<em>  
><em>To live like I see<em>  
><em>A place in this world<em>  
><em>For me"<em>

Abandoning my former home makes me think of my father. He wanted to chase his dreams, but I wouldn't be surprised to find him in prison. I am capable of breaking boundaries. I'm not running away from my responsibilities like him. I'm not running away from my family or the people who love me. My mother could care less and she just wants to be free of having me around. Then she can have more sleep overs with her lovers. My friendship with Carly is over. My relationship with Freddie is toxic. It's destined to explode.

_"I gotta have_

_Roots before branches"  
><em>

If I were to return, I'll have to be better and stronger than before. I'm not changing who I am. I will always be creative and sarcastic with a quick wit. I'll always be argumentative and stubborn. I need to control myself and gain insight on the world. I refuse to be oblivious to the future that is steadily approaching. I'm going to set goals and I am going to meet them. I can't do that at Ridgeway especially with the gossip I would have to endure from the party. If I truly love Freddie now, I always will.

AN: One more chapter. This is it. Are you ready? Review if you're excited! I'm still mapping out that sequel. Any title ideas? PM me for sequel ideas.


	15. Til We Meet Again

Dream on, dream on, dream on,  
>Dream yourself a dream come true<br>Dream on, dream on, dream on,  
>Dream until your dreams come true<br>Dream on  
>Aerosmith - Dream On<p>

Freddie POV:

School starts tomorrow and I rather not go. I may be a nerd, but I see know point in "learning" what I already know. The only benefit of school is being able to see Sam again. We've texted a couple of times, but nothing of real value. I miss hearing her thoughts and opinions. I miss seeing her golden locks and ocean-colored eyes. I miss her laugh and smile that brightens a room. I miss the adventures she would take me on and her brilliant sense of humor. I miss our battles of wit. I miss Sam.

Currently, I am lying on my bed looking at the Galaxy Wars posters on my walls. My door is open. My mom thinks its the best way to monitor me. Mom is making me go to bed super early to prep for the big day. I hear her voice call out to me from the kitchen, "Freddie!"  
>"Yes, Mom." I sigh anticipating what sanitation request is sure to come.<br>"Did you take your tick bath?"  
>"Yes."<br>"Did you put your cloud block in you backpack?"  
>"Yes," I respond slightly irritated.<br>"Did you see if you finally grew leg hairs?"  
>"Mom, I started growing leg hair 6 months ago!"<br>"Why wasn't your mother informed about this?" she asks me.  
>"It slipped my mind!"<br>"Freddie!" Was her voice always this annoying? No wonder why Sam taunts me about my mother.  
>"WHAT?!"<br>"You have mail. Come and get." I leave my room and grab the letter from the counter. There is no return address. I open the envelope and start reading the letter.

_Dear Fredweird,_

_We met along time ago and the second our eyes met I was overcome with an intense feeling. We argue and bicker yet we never fight. At times I can cross the line and you too have hurt me in the past. Was this love at first sight? We were too young for that. To be honest, we still are too young for love. I instantly was drawn to you and we connected. We are so different in the most obvious ways. Your mother is a psychotic, overbearing, and too protective lunatic. My mom could care less about me and my well being. I've always been jealous of that by the way. I wish my mom loved me only a quarter of what your mom loves you. You excel in school and I chose not to put in the effort. You like Galaxy Wars and technology. I know a thing or two about tech, but I'm not nearly the nerd you are. I'm lazy, rude, and violent. I often feel I don't deserve love. My own parents don't truly love me. You said that you loved me, but I'm not sure if you meant it. You were drinking which was very shocking. Don't turn into an alcoholic! As Carly oh so kindly pointed out at the part, I've seen the worst of it from my mother._

_We all used to be best friends. It wasn't till a little thing called love got in the way of all that. That statement is partially incorrect. Love is anything, but a little thing. We spent 12 hours alone and we didn't have our friendly debates like we regularly. We talked and laughed together. We slow danced in the rain! It has to mean something. You know I hate when people touch me. Physical contact between us was always normal. It's easy place a hand on your shoulder or punch you in the arm. Love has consumed my thoughts and dreams all summer and ultimately I feel like it's strangling me. I'm being suffocated with thought of being held by **you,** or touched by **you,** or kissed by **you.** How did this happen? When did this change occur? I was never fond of your crush on Carly. Was my subconscious jealous for your affections for her? Did you have any feelings for me back then?_

_I was always jealous of Carly. I never knew if it had to do with your slightly creepy and obsessive crush on. I hated how she got all the attention. We have a web show named after her and it was all **your** idea. She has everything. She has an awesome brother that is super fun. I know you are also envious of this being an only child. All the boys like her because she's sweet. I'm too feisty for my own good. You followed her around like a puppy. It's not that way anymore. If love really exists, what is it's purpose? We come int the world alone (my birth is a technicality). Eventually we all will die alone. I guess love gives life value and importance. You said it to me drunk and now I'm saying (writing) it to you. I love you. I can't handle this now. I've left Seattle. If fate allows it we'll see each other again. This is only if we are destined to be together. If we feel the same way, maybe we can actually have a relationship. Remember, **I love you**._

_Hate,_  
><em>Sam<em>

She loves me. I love her and Sam miraculously loves me back. Why can't we be together now? She's gone and left me. Where did she go? Is she just trying to avoid me? No more iCarly. No more Sam. How is Carly going to take this? When will I see her again? All I can do is trust fate and destiny to bring her back to me.

2 Years Later

Sam POV:

This only happens to me. This is the second of my schools to be burned down. In third grade, it was Spencer, my former best friends brother, who was responsible. If he wanted, Spencer could probably set fire to the Great Lakes. This time around it was a gas leak in the chemistry lab that caused a huge explosion. Melanie is going to another fancy boarding school. She's academically gifted, who wouldn't turn her away? Her school doesn't have a performing arts scholarship. I'm a better student now than I was before. To be eligible for an academic scholarship you have to able to maintain a 4.0 gpa. I'm not a slug like before. These past two years averaged with my C from freshman year gives me a gpa of 3.0. That's a full letter grade below the requirement.

I can't go to boarding school with prissy Melanie. Where do I go? Sadly my only option is home. I've made some awesome friends at boarding school. Maxine and Charlotte are my soul sisters. We all go by our nicknames that sounds like boy names. Maxine shortens to Max. Charlotte shortens to Charlie. They both are so different. Max is one of four from a poor African American household. She's the smartest girl in our year. She is no nerd though. She has a dry sense of humor and loves action films. Charlie likes comedies and she uses bathroom humor. It's gross, but hilarious. Charlie comes from a rich family and she hates their snobby. Max is a future author and Charlie is planning working for a charity. She wants to give back to the world.

I kept my romantic endeavors at a minimum. The boys school across the street was full of rich and nauseatingly conceited boys. None of them could measure up to the last. I walk down the empty halls of Ridgeway High School. I'm early for the first time in my life. My style has really evolved of the years. I'm wearing a plaid mini skirt, ripped black leggings and a black tank top with my black biker jacket. It's feminine but still kick ass. "Puckett?"  
>I turn my head and see the ever so lovely Miss Briggs and her pointy boob. "What's up Briggs? Still not married?"<br>"What are you doing here?"  
>"I'm trying to get an education. What are you doing here? Annoying innocent students." Her face was clearly shocked. She turned and walked away. I smirked in victory. The halls began to fill with students. I walk to my locker. On my way, I hear the whistles of pervy teen boys.<br>"Hot new girl at ten o'clock" one guy says to his friends. The turn and start gawking. Puberty has been kind to me. I'm still getting curvier every day. One of these perverts decides to approach me, while I'm fiddling with the lock.  
>"Hey sexy mama, how about I take you down to the beach in my van? I could should you a good time."<br>"How about I take you down? I could show you a lot of pain." He grins at me. Of course, my feisty nature is somehow a turn on.  
>"I'd love to see you try." That is not the right thing to say to me.<br>"Great idea." I flipped him and then shoved him in to the locker. The hall was almost silent. Eager eyes were all watching the situation play out. "Learn to respect women, creep," I hiss at him.  
>"Sam?" two voices in unison ask me.<br>"Wendy? Tasha?" I recognize them. Wendy's hair is longer and more wavy. Tasha's hair is a lighter brown. They both haven't changed much.  
>"Oh my gosh," Tasha says. She starts hyperventilating.<br>"We knew you were coming from the email, but we are so excited to see you. It's been forever," Wendy continues for her. We kept in contact via emails the past couple of years.  
>"I'm glad to see you guys too."<br>"You already were in a physical altercation on the first day. I thought you changed," Tasha states.  
>"I did. This was a special circumstance and a lesson to all. We are in school,"I respond to her.<br>"We gotta tell you how much everything has changed. Nothing is the same without you."  
>"Is the school still full of drama?" They both nod. "It's nothing the new Sam can't handle. I haven't really changed. I'm just more ambitious and demonstrate a lot more self control." We went over our schedules and we all share most of the same classes. This is excellent. Luckily we have lunch together. We walk to our first class. I'm excited but worried. I'm finally home. What obstacles could fate and destiny throw my way? I don't know maybe a brunette nub with brown eyes and sits in front of eyes widen in surprise at my appearance. This nub was named Fredward Benson by his mother. Fredward, commonly referred to as Freddie, looks less like the nerd I once knew. This conversation is bound to go well. I can keep avoiding this or attack head on. My impending fate sucks. All I know is that this year is gonna be one hell of a ride.<p>

**The End (For Now)**

AN: This is it. This was actually my first fanfiction story ever. I had a lot of fun writing this, when I was supposed to be doing homework. The sequel will be uploaded at the latest in two weeks. The more reviews = the faster I publish. I have so many ideas. If you have any ideas, PM me. No idea is a stupid idea. I totally need sequel title ideas. Don't forget... REVIEW!


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